


Deep From Within

by micewhiskers



Category: Star Wars, Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Choking, Dirty Talk, Dom!Kylo Ren, Dominant Kylo Ren, F/M, Face-Fucking, Force Bond (Star Wars), I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Inappropriate Use of the Force, Kylo Ren - Freeform, Kylo Ren Has Issues, Possessive Kylo Ren, Protective Kylo Ren, Reader-Insert, Sex, Smut, Top Kylo Ren, sub!Reader
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-11
Updated: 2020-07-10
Packaged: 2021-03-01 16:34:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 31,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23600161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/micewhiskers/pseuds/micewhiskers
Summary: You were just fine with working in the Detention Center on Starkiller base. It made you a little money, you didn’t really have to talk to a bunch of people, and life was simple.But lo and behold, a certain tall, handsome Knight of Ren walks into your life, and everything changes the moment he lays eyes on you.
Relationships: Ben Solo | Kylo Ren/Reader, Kylo Ren & Reader, Kylo Ren & You, Kylo Ren/Reader, Kylo Ren/You
Comments: 16
Kudos: 266





	1. The Commander Himself

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was just a normal day on Starkiller, until it took a major turn.

Working in the detention center of Starkiller had its days. Usually, you had no problem digging information out of the dozens of captured captains, pilots, even the few corrupt First Order officers. But then there were the resistors. The fighters. Spitting vicious threats, callous words to try and break down the walls in your mind. Funny how they may try, you always managed to break them in the end. They would all become putty in your hands and would spill every last _drop_ of information they had at the flit of your wrist. At the end of the week, when you delivered your report to General Hux, he always seemed pleased with your work. However, your most current prisoner was a fighter.

Stepping through the durasteel door, you faced the man strapped to the table before you. The table was upright and his head lolled to the side. He was asleep. You walked over to the table along the right side wall and picked up a heavy metal piece that sat alongside the many other torture devices. You faced the male strapped to the table and dropped the metal piece. The echo was horrendous, ringing out against the sleek floor and making your own ears ring as well. The man woke up immediately and winced as the pains in his body spread like a fire through his nervous system. “Hello again,” you said as his eyes focused on you. Your hands smoothed out the bottom of your uniform jacket. “What do you want?” he spat, a little bit of blood dribbling from his lips. You put your lips into a pout, “Just wanted to check in on you. See if you had anything to share.” He snickered, looking to his feet. “I have nothing to tell you, Empire scum.” You chuckled and ran your tongue over your teeth. 

“Someone sounds a little cranky. Maybe we can fix that attitude of yours?” You pulled a tiny remote from your right pocket and his eyes glowered, his face looking a little green. Just one push of a button and he was writhing in his restraints, groaning and almost screaming in agony. You pushed another button on the remote and he stopped moving. His chest was rising and falling rapidly and more spit fell from his lips. “I’m going to ask you again, boy-” he cut off your sentence with a snarl, “I have a name and it is not _boy_.” Your eyes lit up with a small fire. “I do not care who you are. Here, you are nothing. To me, you are nothing” You spit the words out like it was venom on your tongue. He shuddered lightly. “Now, I am going to ask you again. What did you tell your Republic friends?” He frowned, “I’ll never tell you.” You smirked, “Oh, I think that’ll change, little boy.” You raise your hand and put two fingers up, beckoning a droid from the corner. “IT-000, do what you will with him.” His eyes went wide as he noticed the many sharp prods and probes coming out of the interrogation droid. “Have fun,” you said as you put your arms behind your back, turned, and left the room. As the door shut behind you, all you could hear were the horrible sobs and screams falling from his lips. 

You sighed as you walked down the hallway. He really was a tough nut to crack. You turned right at the end of the hallway and into the control room of the detention center. At a big table that displayed all sorts of graphics and holograms sat your coworker and friend, Min. He was tapping endlessly on a datapad and barely noticed you sit down in the seat next to him. “Oh, hey,” he said after a few seconds. Your lips quirked up into a small smile. “Find something interesting?” Min nods.“Yes. I think I’ve found an engineer on Starkiller that’s trying to sneak off the ship.” He tapped at his datapad more and looked up to the big screen on the table. You looked to it as well and scanned over all the information. “Jean Wittick,” you said as you looked at his hologram, “I have to report this to General Hux. Is he getting any help?” Min tapped more at his datapad. “No, he’s alone. He has planned to take a TIE fighter to an enemy ship tomorrow after hours, but I know you’ll intercept him.” Min was incredible. He was the best slicer in his class at the academy, and he exceeded every expectation you had of him. Min tapped at his datapad again. “I’ll send you all the information about him.” You nodded and strolled out of the control room. 

As you walked out of the detention center, you checked your datapad for the time and skimmed briefly over the information Min had sent you. You continued walking all the way to General Hux’s office, ready to deliver the news. The door to his office hissed open to reveal a tower of black, the color momentarily flushed out of your cheeks. _Commander Ren._ You immediately bowed, “Commander, I’m sorry for the intrusion. I’ll wait outside.” You were about to turn on your heel, but there was a feeling of electricity spreading through your brain, like icy fingers. His cold and monotone voice filtered through the mask, “Stay. I want to hear what you have to say.” You shifted a little uncomfortably, “Very well.” The tall man moved from in front of Hux’s desk, resting in a chair off to the right.

“General,” you began, displaying the corrupt officer as a hologram from your datapad. As you went through the motions of your report, you felt the Commander’s eyes on you through the mask. His gaze cold, lifeless. Was there anyone behind that visor? “He plans to leave tomorrow, General.” Hux nodded his head, “We shall meet him tonight then, if he seems so keen on leaving.” You nodded your head in agreement. “Yes, General.” Hux stood from his desk and typed into his own device, “Meet me at the TIE hangar at 1900 hours.” He waved you off, and you bowed. You faced the Commander, bowing, “Commander, an honor to be in your presence.” You turned and left General Hux’s office. _Wow._ That might have been the most nerve wracked you’ve ever been. The Commander himself sitting in on your report? That must mean something then, if he listened to just a low-rank officer such as yourself. You walked into the mess hall to at least get some food in your belly. On the line there were a few options, like some nameless sandwich followed by some nutritive drinks. You grabbed a sandwich in the hopes of finding a lasting sustenance. 

The sandwich was not the best. You guessed it was supposed to be meat of some kind, but there is absolutely no telling; and besides, you had no time to guess. You stood and returned your empty plate to the line and glanced at the oblong clock hanging on the wall of the room. 16:43. Now to the hangar. 

You were almost to your destination when you felt that electric feeling in your mind again, its icy fingers wrapping further around your brain than last time. Stopping in your tracks, your hands found their way to your head and massaged your temples. What is happening? Was this just an epic migraine about to ensue? The uncomfortable and almost painful feeling retreated, leaving your eyes screwed shut. You opened them again and continued walking to try to shake the feeling till you rounded a corner and through a set of blast doors, revealing the horrible cold of the base. The cold air nipped at your nose and turned it pink. There in front of you stood Hux, a group of stormtroopers and the Commander. _What?_ The confusion in your mind almost made its way to your face. What was he doing here? This was just to be a simple interception _._ As if on cue, the statue of black spoke: “You’re here.” Hux turned to face you as he heard Kylo’s voice. Did you really just use his first name? 

Hux beckoned you closer. “I’ve arranged to meet with our little bird here. He should be arriving in a few minutes.” The Commander said nothing as he stood next to Hux, his arms behind his back and his cape cascading down his body. _Stop_ , what are you talking about? You shouldn’t be wondering about his body _._ Your eyes moved to the Commander and his head tilted slightly. Oh no, could he hear you? The hiss of the blast doors brought you out of your train of thought and you turned with your arms behind your back, facing the noise. “Wittick,” you said. His brow knitted together. “Officer,” he replied. His eyes moved to Hux. “General, I fail to understand-” General Hux interrupted him stoically, “It seems you do fail to understand. You, engineer, are going to be placed in the detention center as of today.” The man began to shake. “I don’t know why, what’s happening?” His words came out in shudders. “Don’t lie. I could rip every bit of information you know out of you right here.” The sound of the Commander’s voice through his mask sent a shiver down your spine, his stance unwavering. Jean twiddled with his fingers nervously. “I swear, I didn’t do anything-” Kylo’s hand rose and Jean stopped speaking, his arms clawing at his neck. “Troopers,” you said and two of them grabbed Jean by the arms and dragged him away. Kylo’s hand fell and all you could hear from behind the doors were faint screams. Hux stepped up next to you and spoke, “Report at 0600 tomorrow.” You nodded. “Yes, sir.” You bowed in front of the Commander, turned on your heel, and walked back through the durasteel blast doors. 

As you made your way back to your room, you began to think. Why had he just sat in on your report? Why had he been at the hangar? Yes, he could do whatever he wanted, but there was nothing interesting about you or what you had to say. You decided to put the thought at rest. It was the Commander, afterall. The door to your room slid open with a hiss and you stepped in, removing your uniform coat, and revealing the charcoal gray tank top underneath. The chill of the room hit you; Starkiller _really_ was cold. All of a sudden, your head started aching. It felt cold, as if fingers were reaching in and pulling at the inside of your mind, and as soon as the sensation came, it was gone. You were about to remove the tank top clinging to your frame, but the door to your quarters hissed open. You jumped at the sight of the dark figure towering over you as he stepped inside and realization hit you: every time your head started aching was always in the presence of the Commander. _He was reading your mind._ “C-Commander, I d-didn’t expect this.” The cold of your room and your nerves got the better of you as you stuttered. You could hear his breathing through his mask and could feel his eyes flitting up and down your body, and you crossed your arms. He finally spoke, “I’ll be going down to the detention center tomorrow. I’d like to see how you work.” You nodded, saying, “Yes, sir.”

  
He turned and walked out of the open door and it shut, leaving you cold and confused. Of course he didn’t mean personally, he just wanted to see your work in person. Right?


	2. Yes or No?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You meet with Kylo and all goes well in the detention center, but things get a little spicy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you can probably tell, I have a LOT of time on my hands to be able to put out this second chapter the day after publishing my first chapter ever on here. Anyway, I hope you like it~ :)

Waking up this early was never fun. With the quiet hum of the base and nippy weather, your whole body was screaming to get back into bed under the warm cover. But, you had work to do. Then you remembered: Kylo. What exactly had he meant when he said he wanted to see how you worked? You slurped lazily at the nutritive drink in front of you. Why did he come to your room? The thought hit you as you remembered him towering over you, his breath filtering through his mask. It felt almost- intoxicating, in a way, with someone that powerful being so close to you. If only you knew what he looked like. Your eyes moved to the clock on the far wall. “Time to go to work,” you mumbled to yourself. As you walked the way to the detention center, you listened to the sound of your footsteps and counted every mouse droid that sped past you. Twelve, to be exact. 

As you strolled into the control room you were met with the visor of his mask and a shiver ran up your spine. “Commander Ren, goodmorning.” You tried to sound as professional as possible without sounding like a dork. He stepped closer to you, eyes studying you behind the mask. “Morning.” He stood in front of you for a few more seconds before you tried to fill the awkward silence. “I suppose you’ll be wanting to meet with the one we intercepted last night, Commander.” All that followed was the breath through his mask. You glanced around Kylo and caught sight of Min, looking like he’d lost his shit. He mouthed the words, “That’s Kylo-fucking-Ren!” and you nodded ever so slightly in response. “Min,” you spoke, “what room is the engineer from last night in?” He gave you the room number and you looked to Kylo again. “This way, Commander.” He said nothing in response. You listened to the sound of his heavy footsteps as he followed quietly behind you, the air around you so thick you could cut it. You reached Wittick’s door and it hissed open. Before you even had the chance of opening your mouth, Wittick perked up at the sight of you, “Please, I didn’t do anything, you have to tell them-” and fell silent at the sight of the man behind you, his eyes wide with horror. You rolled your eyes, “It’d be easier on all of us, engineer, if you just told us everything you planned to do.”

Wittick shook against his restraints, “I promise, I don’t know anything!” He looks as if he’s about to cry. Kylo stepped up from behind you, saying, “I would advise against disobedience.” Wittick let out a few whimpers as he cried, “Please, _please_ , I don’t know anything!” You had had enough. With it being this early in the morning combined with the lackluster breakfast, you were annoyed. You rose your hand, bringing it down swiftly against his cheek. A red welt in the shape of your hand rose, and you could’ve sworn you heard Kylo’s breath catch. An hour goes by and Wittick still hasn't cracked. “Commander,” you say, and he turns to you slowly. “If you’ll allow it, I’d like to take a small break to regroup. Let’s say, fifteen minutes?” His only response is a nod. He doesn’t really speak much, does he? You bow and turn out of the room. In a small break room in the corner of the control center, you managed to find one piece of dried jerky. Aside from the meals provided in the mess hall, there really wasn’t much besides the little amount of personal rations everyone managed to stow away. The break room was empty, you couldn’t even seem to find Min anywhere. Probably doing more of his incredible work, you thought.

Out of nowhere, you heard heavy footsteps behind you. You turned and jumped as Kylo stood over you, just like last night. He steps closer and you take one step back, hitting the counter. He took this chance to step even closer and close the space between your bodies. “C-commander, I d-don’t-” He presses a gloved finger to your lips. “Shh. Do you want someone to hear and walk in?” His vocoded voice sent a shiver up your spine. “Your thoughts are really loud.” He said lowly. “You’ve thought about me quite often since last night.” Your breath caught in your throat at his words. Attempting to try and put space between your bodies, you moved your hips ever so slightly, but his pelvis kept you in place. He let out a low groan at your movements. “I find you very interesting,” he said, your name following after. _He. Knew. Your. Name_. You took a deep breath, your breasts only pushing further into his chest, causing a small warmth to spread in your belly and a quiet gasp to fall from your lips. His hand found your throat and he squeezed lightly, putting pressure on your jugular. Your heart jumped into your throat. “Fuck,” you whispered. That elicited a low chuckle from Kylo and he pressed his hips lightly into you, causing a spark to ignite between your legs. Your cheeks felt hot as his fingers slid from your neck and down your chest.

“Do you like that?” he asked quietly. You tried to find words, but you didn’t know what to say. “Yes or no?” his voice felt a little more demanding. What would you say? The Commander of the First Order was choking you out with you pressed against a counter in the middle of the detention center. Where would honesty get you? What would refusing him do to you? His hips pressed a little harder into you, reminding you to answer. You couldn’t lie, his ministrations made you feel something. “Y-yes,” you whispered. He chuckled again. “Good girl.” His words made you shudder ever so slightly. He removed himself from you and you straightened the bottom of your uniform. “I b-believe our break is o-over, Commander.” Your voice was still quiet. You didn’t really know if it had been fifteen minutes already, you just needed to step away from him. The feeling of his body against yours was maddening, only furthering the feeling between your legs. “Then we should continue with our interrogation,” he replied. 

You nodded in agreement and peeled yourself off of the counter. Once back in the room with Wittick, you felt as if some normalcy had returned to you. However, no matter how hard you tried to forget what just happened, you couldn’t. Why were you even beginning to feel this? He was your _Commander_ , after all! The burn on your cheeks still hasn't faded. You and Kylo spent the rest of the morning breaking Wittick. Well, you mostly. Kylo only stepped in when Wittick had a fit of anger. On multiple occasions, Wittick did spit at you in disgust, where Kylo gave him a good Force choke in return. At around 1600, Kylo turned to you saying, “Officer, I have other matters to attend to. Your work was exceptional today as well. Take the rest of the day off.” You went a little wide eyed, and a little surprised to say the least. “Yes, sir. Thank you Commander.” Kylo turns and leaves, cape flowing elegantly behind him. You dismissed yourself from Wittick and left the detention center quickly, aching to get back to your quarters.

As soon as the door to your quarters hissed shut, you stripped of all your clothes to take a cold shower. Gods, why did he do that to you? You thought back to the break room where Kylo pressed you up against the counter and kept you there with his massive frame. His gloved finger on your lips, his hand around your neck-this shower isn’t working. When you were done, you grabbed a clean tank top and panties and slipped under the covers, the last thing you thought of being you and Kylo, dangerously close.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to try and keep a schedule, so I should be posting chapters a day or two apart! Depending on how deep and how far this story goes, I'll probably have to take more time to write and revise later on. :)


	3. Commander, Please?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux asks you to deliver a message to Kylo, and boy do you deliver.

You woke up with a message on your data pad from Hux. A short memo asking you to report to his office. After putting on your least worn uniform, you marched out of your room and down to Hux’s office. The door opened revealing Hux sitting at his desk, his face wearing the usual look of disdain plastered upon it. “General,” you said as you walked to the front of his desk. “Officer,” he replied, “excellent work yesterday. The Commander told me you did well in the detention center.” The memory of his hips against yours flew to the front of your mind, you could still remember the way his hand felt on your neck. Your cheeks twinged with a light pink as you spoke, “Thank you, sir.” Before you had made it through the door, Hux called you back. “I almost forgot. I’d like you to relay a message to the Commander for me. He should be in the spare office two floors up.” The pink on your cheeks failed to fade away. 

  
He gave you the message and shooed you out of his office. In your ride up the elevator, your fingers twiddled nervously behind your back, your teeth chewing on your bottom lip. You stepped out of the elevator and made your way to the room. Before you knew it, you were in front of the door, ready to knock. The strange sensation of something picking through your brain ran through you and you knew he must be here. You rose your hand to wrap your knuckles on the door, but instead it flew open by itself. You stepped into the room to see Kylo standing at the desk, a hologram displayed on top of it. 

He flipped it off before you could really see what it displayed. “Hello.” His voice echoed off the walls of the office. “Hello, Commander.” You laced your fingers together behind your back and stood as straight as you could, “Commander, General Hux wanted me to relay a message-“ His vocoded voice interrupted you. “I know, Officer.” You remembered that he  _ did _ read your mind before you entered the room. “Oh. Then I’ll be heading to my post, sir.” You looked to the floor before turning away from him. “Stop,” he said, his voice a little deeper. His voice alone made you shiver. You turned back to him, and he beckoned you closer to the desk. Being in front of the desk wasn’t enough for him, you guessed, as he spoke again. “Come around the desk, officer.” Your feet moved you around the desk and right in front of you as your brain screamed at you to stop, pleading you to remain in front of the desk. Kylo watched your every move and immediately closed the distance between the two of you. 

His fingers grabbed at your hips, digging into the fabric of your uniform and pulling you even tighter against him. Your hands flew up to his chest, preventing your breasts from pressing flush to him and as his fingers dug lightly into your hips, your mouth let out a soft yelp. Your nerves exploded to bits as he sat there, studying your face through his mask. He moved your hips ever so slightly against his, causing you to feel the growing length in his pants. Your breath hitched in your throat and he let out a deep chuckle. “How loyal are you to the First Order, officer?” You blinked a couple of times, “V-very, Commander.” Your nerves were shot to hell.  _ Why the hell was he asking you this with his dick pressed to your thigh? _ “Would you say you’re as loyal to me as the First Order?” You could feel his voice resonating in his chest. “Yes, C-commander.” 

His head tilted to the side to examine your face more. You blushed even harder than you had in Hux’s office and looked to your hands that rested on his chest. Immediately, Kylo’s fingers gripped your chin and angled your face back up. Needless to say, the warmth in your belly had ignited again. It spread down to your core, and you ached to feel something down there. “I want you to show me your loyalty, officer. Get on your knees.” He never skipped a beat. So many thoughts raced through your head. Was he really trying to do this? Why was he so interested in you? Surely he could find someone more attractive on Starkiller than an officer like yourself? You finally spoke: “C-commander I d-don’t understand.” Your voice came out quietly. As if he couldn’t get any taller, he somehow managed to tower over you even more. “On. Your. Knees.” His voice made that fire in your belly only ache more. Seemingly unhappy with your response to his demand, Kylo used the Force and grabbed hold of your body, pushing you to your knees. Your interest became his shoes, the floor, anything but that mask. “Look at me.” 

Curiosity got the better of you and you tilted your head up, chewing on your bottom lip. Then you saw it. Your eyes widened, and your hands now resting on your thighs squeezed tightly. The tent in his black pants was huge. Yours eyes flitted nervously to the visor of his mask. His hands moved quickly to his belt, unclasping it and letting the thick band fall to the floor. Before you knew it, he had pulled his pants down to let his dick spring free. There it was, in all of its glory. It was  _ massive _ . Pre-cum was leaking from the red tip already. His gloved hands gathered your hair into a makeshift ponytail in his hand and guided your mouth closer to his head.  _ Just this once, _ you thought.  _ I’m only doing this once. _ Your mouth opened, and he slid his warm length into your mouth. He groaned at the feeling, and you almost gagged on him. Gods, he was huge. His dick twitched as it reached the back of your throat. 

He groaned again in satisfaction, reveling in the feeling of your mouth. You slowly went up his member and wrapped your lips around his head, hollowing your cheeks and sucking. He moaned lightly and tugged you back down his length. You gagged and almost fell back from the force of his dick hitting the back of your throat. He bucked his hips into your mouth again, and you grabbed at his thighs to stabilize yourself. You felt uncomfortable with holding him like this, so you slowly retracted your hands. Invisible hands grabbed at yours and forced them back onto his thighs. With his hand still holding your hair, he began to bob your head onto him. You let out a tiny whimper as he slammed into your mouth. Kylo let out quiet moans as well, clearly enjoying the feeling of face fucking you. Your fingers dug into his thighs as his pace picked up. 

The fire in your stomach only burned more as his dick began to hit the back of your throat repeatedly. He twitched in your mouth and you knew he was close. You hollowed your cheeks and moved your tongue against him as much as you could, earning a groan and a string of curses to fall from his lips. “Fuck, fuck,  _ fuck _ .” His hips stilled and he shot thick ropes of cum down your throat and you swallowed every last bit. His chest was rising and falling heavily. He pulled out of your mouth and pulled his pants back up. Your hands left his thighs to hand him his belt, and he said nothing as he took it from you and fitted it back around his waist. He looked back down at you and focused on the saliva coating your lips. Your tongue darted over your bottom lip, unaware of his quiet monitoring. 

You stood up and looked down to your feet. Was he satisfied? “I am.” You forgot he could read your mind. “Thank you, I guess, sir.” You were about to run out of the room, but he grabbed you and faced you towards the desk. “Lay down.” Your eyes grew wide, “But sir,” he said nothing as he pushed you down onto the desk. Your breath quickened. Kylo wasted no time in massaging the curves of your ass, delivering a quick slap to your cheek. You yelped and you only ached for more. He chuckled at your reaction, “So eager for me.” You bit your lip to suppress the moan rising in your throat. He slapped your ass again, another yelp. Your fingers gripped at the edge of the desk and you put your forehead against the cool surface. You felt Kylo’s fingers dip into the band of your pants. 

“Wait,” you shot up from the desk and he coaxed you back down. “Relax.” Anxiety coursed through you. Was this really about to happen? His fingers slipped back into the hem of your pants, pulling them down over your ass slowly. You sighed slowly and nervously. He yanked your shoes off and removed your pants completely, exposing your panties. A gloved finger ran across the inside of your thigh. Your fingers were gripping the edge of the desk so tight that your knuckles were turning white. His finger traced over the red marks on your ass left by his hand. After a few seconds, his finger hooked into your panties and waited for your reaction. Once you didn’t move, he slid them down your legs and left them hanging on your right foot. 

A finger slid up and down over your wet heat, causing you to jump from the sensation. “So wet for me and I’ve barely touched you.” You instinctively clenched at his words. You heard him sit down in a chair and he pulled your legs further apart, admiring the view between your legs. You shifted nervously as he said nothing. “C-commander?” Your voice was small as you turned your head to see behind you. He grabbed a handful of your ass and kneaded it, “Look forward.” You nodded and complied, closing your eyes as his fingers ran over your slit. A mewl threatened its way out of your mouth. Without warning, he shoved a gloved finger into you, twisting and curling it around. You moaned loudly, immediately slapping a hand over your mouth to quiet yourself. Something pried at your hand and forced it back onto the desk. “Don’t cover your mouth. I want to hear you.” You breathed shakily, “Yes sir.” He inserted another finger, pumping in and out, groaning at how tight you were around his fingers. You moaned quietly as his fingers pumped at a steady pace. You tilted your ass up to give him better access, but he only removed his fingers from your heat. Your thighs quivered at the loss of his gloved fingers. “Fuck, I need a better view.” You heard a hiss and something heavy was set on the desk beside you.  _ His helmet _ . His hands pulled your ass up more until it was probably dead square in his face. 

His tongue licked at you from your clit all the way down to the bottom of your heat. You moaned in response. “Fuck,” you whispered. His hand landed on your ass again, gaining another yelp. “Such a dirty mouth.” His voice without the vocoder sent shivers up your spine. Without warning, his tongue pushed into your pussy. You squealed at the feeling of his tongue, it felt amazing. He fucked you with his tongue as his thumb drew lazy circles into your clit. You moaned again, pushing your ass a little more into his face. You could feel him smirking against you. He removed his tongue and replaced it with his fingers, still gloved. The ridges in his gloves felt so good against your walls as he fucked you with his fingers. You moaned out, “Commander, please,” and he chuckled deeply. “What do you want?” You moaned as you felt your release coming. “Please make me cum Commander.” Your voice was quiet, but it’s all Kylo needed to hear. His fingers worked a little faster and his thumb massaged your clit evenly. You mewl loudly as your thighs begin to shake against him. “Come on, cum for me, bitch.” And that’s all you needed.

You released all over his fingers and you clenched against them as you rode out your orgasm. You pant against the desk as he removes his fingers from you. You pick your head up slowly at the sound of his mouth sucking at his fingers. “You taste amazing.” Your cheeks burned at his words. You heard him pick his helmet back up and the locks hiss into place. “You can get up now.” Slowly, you pushed yourself off of the desk. Your legs felt like jelly as you stood, Kylo’s hands grabbing your hips to stabilize you. “Thank you,” you said quietly. He watched through the visor as you put your panties, uniform pants and shoes back on. “I’ll be seeing you,” your name falling from his lips again. You nodded with a blush still on your cheeks and you step from behind the desk. Gods, that felt amazing, you thought as you walked out of the office and down to the detention center, your cheeks a bright cherry red.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can’t believe I wrote about 2,500 words of just smut
> 
> But anyways, hope you enjoyed and please stick around for more! :)


	4. Lieutenant.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another end of the week on Starkiller and another report to Hux, but everything's changed once you leave his office.

It had been two weeks since Kylo had bent you over that desk. Two weeks since he had stuffed his dick down your throat. You had been thinking of him almost every day after that. His strong hands, long legs… Min shoved you lightly, breaking you from thought. “Hey, did you hear me?” You looked to him as you both sat in the control room. “Yeah,” you nodded, “I just zoned out a bit, sorry.” Min shot you a look of disbelief. “You’re thinking about the Commander, aren’t you?” Your cheeks flushed, “No.” The words came out of your mouth rather sternly. But he was right. Whenever you thought of him, you zoned out completely. Wherever you were, you’d be gone. “Drop it,” you said after a few seconds.

Min held his hands up in defeat, “Fine.” You huffed out in exasperation. Ever since he came in two weeks ago, Min had been pestering you about what had happened. Did he say anything? Did he do anything? It did annoy you to a point, but his words always brought up the memories. You on your knees, taking his thick length, you felt like you’d need another cold shower tonight. You look at the hologram above the table. “Shift ends in half an hour.” Min sat back in his chair, head back, “Finally, we get to go get some food.” He turns to you, “You should really get one of the sandwiches these days, just drinking those nutritives isn't enough, you know.” You nod and look to your knees, “I know, but the food they serve really isn’t the best.” He sighs. “Still.” You and Min sat, chatting til the shift ended. “I’ll meet you in the mess hall after reporting to Hux.” Min saluted you with two fingers flying loosely from his forehead, “Later.” 

For the past two weeks, reporting to Hux was nerve wracking. Thinking of seeing the Commander again brought nervous butterflies to your stomach, and not seeing him made it worse. Would you just walk around a corner and he would happen to be there? Would today be the day you walked into that office and he was there, hands behind his back and standing tall? Possibly. But you never knew. You took a deep breath before crossing the threshold of Hux’s office. The wave of relaxation that rolled through you felt amazing. He wasn’t there. It was just you and the General. “General,” you said. He sat at his desk with his elbows propped up, fingers laced together. You mentioned the number of people being held in the detention center and Wittick. “I’ve gotten little bits out of him here and there, but I think that he will not prove to be very useful to us anytime soon.” 

Hux inhaled, straightening his back. “Then I do not believe, Officer, that we should be wasting our resources on him.” You nod, knowing exactly what he meant. “I’ll have it taken care of immediately, sir.” He leans back in his chair. “I also have some good news.” You perk up slightly, hesitant for his answer. “A few other… people and I have noticed your work here on Starkiller, and I have been advised to appoint you to be my right hand, and you will be given the title Lieutenant. Your cheeks flush lightly. Who else besides Hux had noticed your work? Your thoughts quickly went to Kylo, but you pushed the thought out of your brain immediately. “Thank you very much, sir.” You bow your head respectfully. “Now that I have a position to fill, who do you recommend to fill your position?” You immediately thought of Min. He was excellent, and most definitely qualified. “Min Dallinger. He’s perfect for the position.” He nods, typing into a datapad off to his right. “I’ll see to it that he is put in your place.” You nod again. “Also, Lieutenant, tomorrow, I have to go aboard the Finalizer for important business and would like for you to accompany me.” 

Your eyes widened. “Y-yes sir.” Tomorrow? You’d be able to step off of Starkiller for the first time since you were stationed here. Your eyes drop to the floor, thinking of how you wouldn’t be able to work with Min anymore. “Report to the docking bay tomorrow at 1100.” You take a deep breath in, “Yes sir.” Once out of Hux’s office, you almost ran to the mess hall. You had to tell Min. 

In the mess hall, you found him with a sandwich in one hand, his other flicking through his datapad furiously. “Min,” you said as you sat across from him. He stopped paying attention to his datapad and focused on you. “Thought you’d never show up,” he said as he stuffed his face with the sandwich. “So, how’d it go?” You look to your hands resting on the cold surface of the table. “I’ve been promoted. I’m going to the Finalizer with Hux tomorrow. You’re taking my place, Min.” He chewed nonchalantly at his food. “I know, just got the message on my datapad.” Of course he did. “Well, how do you feel?” You say. He nods, eyeing his sandwich. 

“I feel pretty happy you got promoted. You’ve worked hard and you deserve this!” Your cheeks turned a light pink.

“Thanks, Min.”

“So when do you leave for the Finalizer?” Your legs crossed under the table. “Tomorrow at 1100.” He takes another bite of his sandwich. “That’s honestly really awesome, you know.” You smile, “Yeah, it is.” Min walked with you to the line and sat with you as you ate your own food. For the rest of the evening, both of you talked about your trip to the Finalizer. If you were honest, you were nervous. You had no idea what was to be in store for you. “Do you know how long you’re staying there?” You shook your head, “Nope. Hux never mentioned our stay there as permanent. He didn’t really mention anything else, either.” Min chuckled, “Typical Hux.” You both stayed in the mess hall for another hour before you had noticed the mess hall was empty. “I better get back to my room, Min. I still have to pack and all.” You both stood from the table and hugged each other.

“Don’t be so sad,” he said calmly, “We’ll see each other again.” And with that, you both parted ways, waving goodbye. This was to be the first time you both had ever been separated. Min was your only friend on this icy base, and not being able to work with him seemed horrible. But he was right, you deserve this promotion. The hard work you’ve put in has finally been noticed. You packed the only two uniforms you had into a small bag and put it under the thin cot you called a bed. The clock on your datapad read forty five minutes past 2200. Gods, you’d be tired tomorrow if you didn’t get sleep. You lay down, head hitting the pillow. Tomorrow, everything was going to be different. After all, a new day is a new beginning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry there was no Kylo in this chapter! I wanted to add more plot to the story before things got spicy again :)


	5. The Finalizer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You arrive on the Finalizer, and there’s a little (it’s quite big, actually) surprise in your room.

Today was the day. You’d be leaving Starkiller to board the Finalizer with General Hux, and you wouldn’t be able to see Min in who knows how long. You thought back to his words. “Don’t be so sad. We’ll see each other again.” His words brought a small smile to your lips. “We’ll see each other again,” you repeat to yourself quietly. You stood from the bed with your packed bag hanging from your shoulder. The door to your room hissed open and you stepped out, making your way to the docking bay. The bay had all the important ships. The Commander’s own TIE fighter was docked in there, along with his Command Shuttle. You sigh, the  _ Commander. _

Thinking of him just brought back the memories from two weeks ago, brought back all of the questions. Why did he decide your throat needed to be fucked? What was so important about  _ you? _ You blink the thoughts away and march into the bay. Immediately, you pick out the fiery red head of General Hux and walk towards him. “Good morning, General.” He regards you with a side glance. “Lieutenant.” 

“We’ll be leaving shortly.” His words came out icier than usual. Must be in a bad mood, you thought. You stare at his hands wrapped behind his back before speaking, “General, may I ask what shuttle we’re taking?” You heard the light scoff under his breath. “The Command Shuttle.” His words struck you, slapping you across the face. “Oh,” was all you had managed to say. Your mind felt warm, tingly. Warm fingers wrapped around your brain, and left as soon as they had come. You whipped your head around to look at the entrance of the docking bay, and there he came, barreling around the corner. 

You stiffen, a chill running through you. “You’re late,” Hux groans. “It’s my shuttle, General. I board whenever I please.” You could hear Hux’s eyes roll in his head. Kylo turns to you. Your breath hitched, he was about to talk to you for the first time in two weeks. “Lieutenant.” His voice filtering through the mask brought heat to your cheeks. “Commander.” You thought of his voice without the vocoder. It was deep, rich. Kylo tilted his head to the side as he stared at you through the mask.  _ Shit. _ He heard you. 

You could feel him smirking through his mask as you stared into the visor. He turned, and you looked above him. There it was, the Command Shuttle. The ramp lowered and Kylo walked up, disappearing into the massive ship. General Hux did as well, and you followed. The inside of the shuttle was beautiful. You imagined the mechanical work and engineering took forever by the look of the console. Kylo and Hux both walked to the console at the front, while you walked to the back, finding a passenger room. You sat on a durasteel bench on the side and pulled out your datapad. It blinked to life and a message popped up, “Good luck! I’ll see you soon!” It was from Min.

The words ran through your head dozens of times. You’ll see him again, you assure yourself. The ship started humming, and then you felt it lift off from the bay. Here we go. 

When you arrived at the Finalizer, Kylo left immediately, going who knows where, and Hux had dismissed you to your new room. You read the number on your datapad carefully and followed the numbered doors. You pressed a key on the pad next to the door and it hissed open, revealing a dark shadow in the center of the room.  _ Kylo. _ Invisible arms grabbed at you and pulled you in the room, the doors quickly sealing shut behind you.

“Commander, I-“ He cuts you off by grabbing you by the hips and slamming himself against you. You quiet a yelp and clamp your legs together. “C-commander,” the words came out more like a mewl than an actual word. He peels the strap of your bag from your shoulder and flings it to the floor carelessly. He was breathing heavy and you could feel him hard against your thigh. The heat between your thighs had ignited yet again, and you’d be willing to bet you were soaked. Kylo chuckled. “Soaked, you say?”  _ Fuck.  _ His hand dips under the fabric of your pants, into your panties, and over your wet heat. You whimper, and grip at his arms tightly. Without warning two fingers delve deep into you, swirling around and stretching you. 

Kylo removes his fingers from you and brings them up to his face. You were right. His gloved fingers were glistening and dripping with your essence. Your cheeks turn cherry red at the sight. He chuckled again. “Open your mouth.” You were a little hesitant, but opened your mouth nonetheless. He slid his fingers into your mouth, and you start sucking and twirling your tongue around them. 

He pulled his hand from your mouth, growling lowly, “On your knees.” You oblige, lowering yourself and looking up at him through your lashes. You could’ve sworn you heard his breath hitch. He made no movement to undo his belt, and you understood what he wanted. Your fingers trailed up his legs and ghosted over his dick, earning a groan from him. His belt came off and his pants lowered, revealing his under robes. You reached under the band of his under robes and pulled out his massive length. Gods, you wanted him to fuck you right then and there. He snickered. “If you’re a good girl.” 

The warmth between your legs grew hotter at his words. Kylo’s hand traveled to the back of your head, gathering a handful of hair and pushing you closer to his dick. You open your mouth and he pushes himself to the back of your throat. You hollow your cheeks and start bobbing against him immediately. He moaned lowly, head tilted up. You watched as he starts breathing harder, thrusting his hips to meet the bobbing of your head. “Fuck,” he says quietly. You feel him twitch in your mouth and you push yourself till your lips are touching the base of his dick. He thrusts a few more times before spilling himself into your mouth. 

You breathe heavily as he removes himself from your mouth, staring down at you. His fingers move to your chin and his thumb runs over your glistening lips. “Good girl.” Your core clenched at his words. You stand and wipe the saliva off your lips. “Get on the bed.” You slowly crawl onto the mattress, sitting upright. Kylo kneels on the bed and removes your shoes, pulling your pants off, your panties following suit. You close your legs in embarrassment. “Open them.” The mask stares blankly at you. “Open. Them.” You shudder, and open them slowly. Kylo’s hands grip at the backs of your thighs and spread them further. He slides between your legs and his fingers begin working at the buttons of your uniform coat. 

Once your coat is open and off he reaches behind your back and practically rips your bra off, exposing your breasts. He kneads them in his hands, pinching at your exposed nipples. You moan at his touch as he continues to play with your breasts. “They’re perfect,” he breathes. You moan again. “Please,” you say quietly. “Please what?” He squeezes your breasts again. “Please fuck me, C-commander.” You felt as if you practically whispered it to him. He pumped his dick a few times before pushing into you slowly. 

You gasped as he filled you, he was so  _ big. _ That was the only time Kylo went slow. After a few seconds for you to get used to his size, he pulled out and slammed back in. You moaned loudly and bit the inside of your cheek to try and quiet yourself. Kylo’s hand found its way to your throat, squeezing as he pummeled into you. You moaned again, “Shit,” and Kylo’s grip around your throat tightened a little. “Dirty mouth,” he said in between thrusts. Your legs wrapped around him and pulled him closer to your frame. He growled through the vocoder, “So needy.” His free hand fell next to your head to stabilize himself as he managed to go deeper into your throbbing pussy. 

“Say my name,” he moaned. “C-commander,” you stuttered. He threw his head back and then looked back at you through the mask. “No. I said say my  _ name. _ ” Your eyes blew wide at the thought of calling him Kylo out loud. He snapped his hips into yours harshly, “Say it.” You moaned out his name, “Kylo.” He moaned too. 

“Again.” The snapping of his hips becoming desperate.

“Kylo,” you said a little louder. The pressure in your abdomen was getting stronger.

“Again!” He growled as he positioned himself upright, your legs thrown over his arms. 

“Kylo!” You moaned out, and that was it. Stars swarmed your vision as you came around him, milking his dick perfectly. Shortly after, Kylo came undone within you, spilling himself deep into your core. You both rode out your orgasms, breathing heavily. He pulled out, stuffing himself back into his pants. You were gasping for air, he had, quite literally, left you breathless. Kylo put his belt back on, and he threw your panties onto the bed. You slipped them back up your legs. If Min knew what you were doing, he’d lose his shit. 

“Who’s Min?” Your gaze met his mask. “Just a friend,” you said quietly. He breathed in response. He turned to the door. You don’t know what came over you, you had to stop him. “Wait,” you said as you jump in front of him. Your hand was on his chest to keep him from moving. “Are you going to ignore me again?” His voice came out a little cold, “What?” You blinked nervously. “Are you just going to ignore me, acting like you’ve never even touched me, before deciding you want me to suck you off again?” You look down to see his fists clenching. Sighing, you remove your hand from his chest and step out of the way. “Sorry,” you mumble, your confidence lost. His hand raises, and brushes a piece of hair behind your ear.

“I don’t ignore you.” Your eyes lit up a little at his words. His visor met your gaze, and his fingers left your hair and trailed to your chin, squeezing lightly, before leaving without another word.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi! thank you for 500 hits, I never expected it to be honest. but thank you!! anyways, hope you enjoyed, and please stick around for more updates!! :)


	6. There’s Nothing Interesting About Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You keep forgetting that Kylo can hear your thoughts all the time. Seriously, he hears everything you think about. Including your thoughts about him.

When you woke up the following morning, the soreness in your thighs and core was awful. Kylo really did a number on you. You did your best to mask the hobble in your legs as you continued on to meet Hux. The memories from last night replayed in your mind. His words growling at you,  _ “Say my name.”  _ You shivered at the thought. The thoughts continued all the way til you stumbled into someone, “Oh, I’m sorry, I was lost it thought-” and you saw him. Kylo, at his full height, towering over you. 

Your core ached as your eyes met with his visor. “I know what you were thinking.” You squeak as he steps closer. “So dirty,” he says lowly as his hand snakes its way up to your neck, squeezing. “And I know you want me to do it again.” A heat ignites between your legs. “Commander, I’m sorry,” he presses himself flush against you.  _ Holy shit. _

“There’s no need to apologize, Lieutenant.” You thank the Gods that no one was in the hallway with you two. You stare into his visor, hoping that your eyes are meeting his. That damned mask of his. If you were honest, you wanted to rip it off. You wanted to stare into the eyes behind the visor, kiss the lips that call your name. Wait a minute, what the hell are you thinking? He’s the Commander of the First Order, he’d never show his face to just a lieutenant, let alone kiss you. 

You clear your head of the thoughts smacking you in the brain. You clear your throat before speaking quietly, “I don’t think the General would appreciate my being late on my first day, Commander.” You break contact with his visor and look down. “He wouldn’t.” His lack of words was so irritating sometimes. 

“I’ll be on my way, Commander.” You move around him and begin to continue your path to Hux. “Wait.” His monotone voice stops you dead in your tracks. “I’ll walk with you.” He takes three long strides before he’s already caught up to you and walking ahead of you. “Yes sir.” You followed behind him without saying another word. 

When you both reached Hux’s office, he wore a look of slight surprise when you entered. “Commander, I wasn’t expecting you.” Kylo stood tall, hands behind his back head high. “I need to have a word with you Hux.” He looks agitated at Kylo’s words. “Of course, Commander.” You wonder what Kylo was going to say that Hux seemed so annoyed. Yet, Hux seemed annoyed ALL the time. 

“I’d like my ship prepared for tonight. I’m leaving.” Hux took a deep breath in and sighed heavily, “Of course, Commander.” Kylo turns away from Hux and stands next to you, “Lieutenant.” The way he speaks sounds a little informal, as if he’s trying to speak to you personally. “Commander,” you reply as you look into his visor. 

Kylo turns and leaves the office without another word. “ Lieutenant,” Hux’s voice snaps you to attention. “We’ve got work to do.” Most of the day was spent helping Hux organize, you even sent the order yourself for Kylo’s ship to be prepared. A few people did come in to report to Hux, and you would just stand by his desk politely with your hands behind your back. Then Hux had you running all over the Finalizer delivering messages, bringing things back to him and such. 

Before you knew it, the day was over and Hux was dismissing you. The food in the mess hall was a little different than Starkiller. You could probably even say it was a little better than the mush on that icy base. The walk back to your room was a long one. Thoughts of Kylo and his dumb mask clouded your mind. You had no idea what had come over you. Wanting to kiss the Commander? Wanting to see his face? Never gonna happen. You sigh sadly. 

How did this happen? One minute, you were in the detention center, the next you’re sucking Kylo Ren down like he’s the best fucking lollipop in the world. Your stomach did flips at the thought. His dick throbbing in your mouth, him eating you out on that desk. Gods, that felt  _ so _ good. As soon as the door to your room seals shut, you peel your uniform off and throw a tank top on. You turn restlessly on the thin mattress. “Dammit,” you mumble to yourself. You were gonna be tired in the morning if you didn’t go to sleep soon. You were about to turn over again but the sound of your door opening and heavy boots made you shoot up in your bed. Your eyes met his visor. “C-commander,” you said shakily. 

Your eyes fell as you remember your thoughts from earlier. “I thought you had already left.” He kneels in front of your bed to be at eye level with you. “I wanted to see you before I left.” Your gaze left the floor and shot up to his mask, “Why?” You heard his breath filtering through the mask. The question lingers in the air for a minute before he finally answers. “I find you...interesting. You grab my attention constantly.” You twiddle your thumbs nervously. “There’s nothing interesting about me, Kylo.” He scoffs. “I beg to differ. I can’t get you out of my head,” he pauses, “You have no idea how often I hear you. Your thoughts…” 

He’s heard everything, you think. Dammit. He continues, “It’s almost sad, in a way. You sound sad, too.” Your expression falls slightly, you suppose you do sound a little pitiful in your head. His hands rise to his mask, the locks hissing and the vocoder piece rising so he can take the helmet off. He stands and you rise with him. The mask thuds to the floor as he stares at you. Your breath hitches. 

He was beautiful. His eyes were a crisp brown, his hair long and luscious, running in black waves. His lips are pink and full. “Kylo…” you trail off. He’s still staring at you, his eyes flitting from your eyes to your lips. You step close to him and trail your hands up his chest and to his shoulders. His hands wrap around your waist, one falling to your ass and squeezing. You grab two handfuls of his robes and pull him down to your eye level and smash your lips into his. He groans as your fingers run through his hair, pulling at his soft locks. He picks you up and you wrap your legs around his waist, moaning when he slaps your ass. 

“Kylo,” you moan against his lips. One of his hands works its way to one of your breasts. He squeezes it roughly, massaging it in his hand. You moan into him again. He breaks the connection of your lips and murmurs your name. “I have to go.” You sigh sadly. “I know.” He sets you down on your feet. “I won’t be gone for long. I’ll see you as soon as I get back.” He grabs his helmet from the floor and starts to place it back on his head. “Hold on,” you say as you pull the helmet back down. You stand on your toes and give him another harsh kiss on his soft lips. He grabs you with his free arm and lifts you off of the ground, kissing you back with double the force. He sets you back down and puts his helmet back upon his head. 

“Until next time,” he says before leaving your room and leaving you standing in awe.  _ Holy shit. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m sorry if it’s short, i didn’t really know where to take this chapter. but, i hope you enjoy it nonetheless! :) i hope you stay for more updates!


	7. Only For You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s been two days and your brain just can’t handle Kylo not being on the Finalizer.

“Kylo,” you moan out between kisses. He groans into your neck as he bites and sucks, leaving a trail of sloppy kisses and hickeys all over your skin. Your fingers grab at the band around his waist and throw it to the floor. You moan again when his hands massage your breasts roughly. “Fuck,” you groan into his mouth. You pull the band of his pants down and shove your hand into them. His rock hard dick slaps at your skin and you grip the shaft.

He bucks into your hand and moans into your lips, “Do it.” Immediately, you start jerking him off at a fast pace. “Is that good?” You moan into him. He juts himself further into your hand at your words. “Keep going,” he groans. His large hands fly to both sides of your head, trapping you there. Not that you mind. His dick twitches in your hand, signaling that he was about to cum. He begins thrusting erratically into your grip as he nears. You begin squeezing his dick gently with each of his thrusts, drawings moans and curses to fall from his beautiful lips. He groans one last time before stilling in your hand and spilling himself into it. 

His hands curl into big fists beside your head. Kylo’s eyes open, revealing those golden brown orbs of his. You never break away from his eyes as the hand in his pants rises to your mouth and you lick every drop of him off. In his eyes, you could have sworn you saw something ignite in them. “Take off your fucking pants.” You kick your shoes off and practically rip your pants from your body. You pause when your fingers reach the hem of your underwear. “Take them off,” he growls. 

A smirk rises to your lips. You peck Kylo’s lips hungrily before pushing him away from you, giving you room to move away from the wall. His eyes roam up and down your body in anticipation. You turn to face the wall and begin to peel your underwear off. Kylo’s need for you was practically dripping from him, you felt, as you heard him growl at the sight of your ass and uncovered heat. You turned back to face him and fling the panties at him. He catches them with ease and examines them. “They’re drenched,” he says deeply. You bite your bottom lip; “Only for you.” Kylo takes a stride and pins you to the wall again and kisses you in desperation. Something sticks hard against your thigh. Holy shit, he was hard again. 

“You are mine.  _ Only _ mine. No one else can ever fuck you like I can.” He grinds against you, “Mmm, Kylo,” you moan. “Say it,” he growls, “You’re mine.” He nips at the sweet spot on your neck. “I’m yours,” you moan. He groans into you as he pushes himself against you. Your hands wander to his dark hair and pull roughly. He bites your neck in response, earning a yelp from you. The warmth in your stomach grows even heavier. “Kylo, please,” you beg. He grabs the backs of your thighs and wraps them around his waist. “Use your words,” he groans into your lips. 

“Fuck me Kylo.”

And that’s all you needed to say. Before you knew it, he was ready to push into you. “Ready?” He asks. You nod and moan as his length fills you and stretches you out. “Fuck!” you moan. He begins slamming into you immediately, the sound of skin slapping and of your moans combined with Kylo’s filling the room. “You’re so fucking tight,” he moans. You whimper as his dick slides in and out of you perfectly. “Fuck, Kylo, you’re so big!” You mewl. Kylo adjusts your legs so they’re pressed into your chest as he buries himself deeper into you. 

“Kylo,” you moan in warning of your release. He smashes his lips into yours hungrily. He begins slamming harder into your wet heat and you moan again, “Kylo!” He moves his lips to your ear, whispering, “Do it, cum on my dick.” His hand flies to your clit, working in fast circles on your bundle of nerves. Your thighs begin shaking, your breath growing raggedy. Kylo leans into you again, “Cum for me,” and you were done. Your vision grew white, but quickly transitioned into black.

All of a sudden, you were sitting up in bed and sweating like a pig. It was all a fucking  _ dream _ . “Fuck,” you groan as you feel the warm aching in your core. It was just a dream. Your fingers drop to your wet pussy and start drawing circles around your clit. You were clawing at the details of the dream. Oh, how you wished it had all been true. It felt so good. His lips, his dick in your cunt. Your fingers work faster. “Fuck,” you mumble. Your breath grows ragged as your release nears, the knot in your belly threatening to snap. “Kylo,” you moan quietly. You put your free hand over your mouth to quiet your moans. 

Within seconds, you were cumming on your fingers as you thought of Kylo fucking you deep and hard. Shit, you’d need another shower before work. A cold shower, at that. You look at the clock to your right. 5:46.  _ Sigh. _ A little early to get up, but there was no chance of you going back to sleep anyways. Now you’ll get more time in the mess hall to eat. In the shower, your thoughts were running wild. It has been two days since Kylo left, and all you’ve really managed to do is be Hux’s bitch and have wet dreams about Kylo. How did this even happen? He just walked into your life, fucks you a couple times, and you’re okay with that? Okay with just waiting for him to come back and fuck you again?  _ Yes,  _ a part of you said. I’m totally fine with Kylo fucking my brains out whenever he wants. But…when would he lose interest? All men you’d dated (not that you’re  _ dating _ Kylo) lost interest after a month or two and dropped you like some piece of garbage. You can’t really stop what the Commander of the First Order wants or doesn’t want, and you can’t just break it off and expect to get away with it. You just had to wait it out, you guess. 

And how long would that be? Just stop thinking about it, you screamed at yourself internally. Just calm down. It’ll be alright. With your shower complete and your uniform on, you march to the mess hall. Not a whole lot of people are in the hall, mostly night shift workers eating before they go to bed. You wonder what the night shift is like. Surely less people, you thought. Or maybe not. Who knows? The food on the line is the same as always. At least it looks the same, anyways. For almost an hour, you sit in the hall, wasting time before you meet with Hux. Another day of working as his bitch, you thought. But it was a privilege to be his right hand. Not many get the opportunity. You hope Hux is in a tolerable mood today. 

As you stroll into his office, it’s like he peeks up at the sight of you. “Lieutenant. I’ve got something important for you today.” Great. Today should be a busy day. “What is it, sir?” You walk over to his desk where he pulls up a coded piece of map on the holo. The hologram ripples a little as you study the map. “The Commander has found this important map and I want you to use your excellent capabilities to see what you can make of it.” It’s a map of the system, you knew that much. You start to pick the map apart and piece it back together on the hologram. It doesn’t take you long before you find an answer. “It’s a map of the Outer Rim, General. A certain planet, I think…” You trail off and continue pulling it apart.

“There isn’t a name of the planet anywhere on this General. All it says is that it is snowy and mountainous.” You tap further at the holographic screen floating above his desk. “The only planet that fits that description is,” a planet shows up on the screen, “Stygeon Prime. Cold and has lots of mountains.” The General smirks. “Amazing. The Commander was right in suggesting you as my right hand.” What? Kylo told Hux… to make you his right hand? And he was right? If Kylo wasn’t interested in you, then how do you explain this? You push the thoughts away. “Thank you, sir, but what I don’t understand is what’s important about Stygeon. I don’t really know anything about it.”

Hux clicks the heels of his boots together. “Well then, Lieutenant. You’d best get to looking.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the hits! i never expected it and i am so glad that so many people have even read this! thanks again, and hope you’re here for the next update! :)


	8. The Command Shuttle and the Holocron

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo comes back, Hux is in an awful mood, and Kylo shows you something unexpected.

“Shit,” you mumble to yourself. Hux had had you in front of the ship’s database for the rest of the day. You were even forced to take your findings to your room and finish it there. The bright screen of your datapad burns your eyes. You’d only been staring at it for the whole of the day. Your mind drifts from your work. “I wonder what important stuff Kylo’s doing,” you said quietly. Your datapad made a thud as you dropped it on the tiny desk. He’s probably wreaking havoc on something, you thought. Afterall, he was famous for his raging temper. 

You glance at the blaring screen on the desk. It’s almost two in the morning. “Gods, I need to sleep if I’m going to report to duty tomorrow morning.” You stand from the desk and stretch, your arms rising above your head and back arching. The hum of the ship was quiet, calming. It only made your eyelids droop more as if you weren’t already about to pass out. You peel your uniform jacket off and kick your pants to the floor, not bothering to lay them out for the morning. Almost as soon as your head hits the pillow, your eyes close and you drift off to sleep. 

~

General Hux was in a horrible mood this morning. Every order he gave you came out in a angry, glaring bark. Whatever ticked him off had really done its job. He wouldn’t even listen to your report before getting a look of absolute boredom on his face. Gods, you wanted to deck him in the face and walk out so bad. Almost two hours of following him around and fulfilling his every whim went by before he sent you away. “The Commander is supposed to be arriving today. Go wait in the hangar, I particularly don’t care to see him today.” 

Gladly, you stroll out of his office and to the hangar, almost excited to see Kylo again. You had to admit, you always felt a rush seeing that sleek helmet and those black robes. It made your stomach erupt into butterflies when you wouldn’t know what he would do next. For the next hour, you waited on a bench on one end of the hangar before the Command Shuttle barely landed. It was more of a controlled crash, really. One of the wings was cut off partly, it was smoking, and there were holes laced with molting metal all over it. 

Dozens ran to the shuttle to extinguish and examine it. Engineers, a team of people with extinguishers, you could’ve sworn you saw a doctor run by too. Along with almost everyone else, you ran to the ramp of the shuttle that was now descending. There he came, a wave of black robes rolling down the ramp and stopping dead in front of you. “Commander, are you alright?” You glance at the melting hunk of ship again. “I’m fine,” he replied. The doctor you saw run by earlier pushes you aside and you almost fall to the floor. Invisible hands grab onto your arms and balance you on your feet again.  _ Kylo. _ In the doctor’s hands, he has some sort of device running scans all over Kylo’s body. “Excuse you,” you say as obnoxiously as possible. The doctor gives you a side glance and continues ignoring you. What you didn’t expect was Kylo stepping close to the man, “Watch yourself, doctor.” His tone was cold and unforgiving. Was he...defending you?

The doctor immediately bows to Kylo, “I’m sorry, Commander.” The man turns, throws you another look, and walks away without another word. _ Asshole _ , you said mentally. Kylo tilted his head at you. Yet again, he heard everything. “Follow me, Lieutenant.” You nod and follow close behind, leaving the crowd of people to worry about the shuttle. It was a few minutes before you spoke to him, “Are you sure you’re okay Commander? The Command Shuttle looked rough.” The sound of his heavy boots echoes throughout the hall. “I’m fine.” You sigh mentally. So now we’re back to barely speaking. “Good,” you say quietly. You realize your surroundings quickly, Kylo is walking back to Hux’s office. 

Before you knew it, you were back in his office and Hux looks more angry than ever. “ _ Kylo _ ,” he growls through his teeth. “Why would you do that? You knew they’d chase after your ship. It’s amazing you even limped back here.” You saw Kylo’s hands turn into fists by his sides. Oh boy. “I’m still here, Hux. Obviously, I’m fine.” You swore you could see steam coming from Hux’s ears. “That’s not the point. You could have led the enemy right to us.” Kylo storms up to Hux’s desk, placing a small, metal looking pyramid down. It couldn’t be… 

“Very well, but I still fail to believe that no one followed you here,” Hux retorts. Kylo’s fisted ball by his sides again, and in a second his lightsaber was in his hands and ignited. You jump back to avoid being cut from the hot, cauterizing blade. Kylo’s arms rise, both hands around the hilt of his saber, preparing to swing down. He stabs down into Hux’s desk, creating a deep white hot hole in the center. Without another word he snatches the holocron up and stalks out of the room. Both you and Hux stand in complete silence before he starts shaking in anger, “Leave. You’re dismissed.” 

_ Gladly _ , you thought. You almost skipped with glee as you left his office. As you turn to walk to your room for the rest of the afternoon, you crash into a mass of black, “Commander, I’m sorry,” you say as quickly as possible. “Follow me.” His words still sound heated from his argument with Hux. You get a few stares from others in the hall as you pass by, but you hold your head high to make yourself seem high rank. Fake it till you make it, right? Suddenly, Kylo stops in front of a door and shoves you inside gently. The room you’re in is quite big, definitely larger than your small quarters. Then you realize, it’s  _ his  _ quarters. Kylo walks down to the end of the hall on the right and enters a room. When you look inside, you see a large bed and another door, possibly a refresher inside it. 

You watch Kylo now. His hands lift his helmet off of his head and drop it to the floor. He sets the holocron on the metal bedside table gently and begins removing his cowl. He tosses the fabric to the floor and steps close to you, his large hands gripping your hips tightly. One hand travels from your hip, over your breasts and to your chin. He grips it between his thumb and forefinger and tilts your head up to expose more of your neck. His lips connect with the spot behind your jaw, sucking and nipping at the soft skin. You moan softly into his ear, your own hands finding their way into his hair and pulling softly. Kylo moves down your neck, leaving dark hickeys in his wake. “Kylo,” you moan quietly. 

His other hand darts behind your back and to your ass, pushing you into him and squeezing roughly. He lets go of your chin and moves his other hand to rest on your backside, and a warm feeling spreads its way between your legs. You pull Kylo’s hair till his head raises from your neck and you kiss him hungrily. He growls into your mouth and slaps your ass hard. You moan into his mouth, and he takes the opportunity to shove his tongue into yours. Both of you fight for dominance but it’s no use as his tongue flattens yours and explores your mouth. He delivers a harder slap to your ass. “Mmh,” your moan comes out muffled. 

Kylo uses his hands and holds you in place as he grinds his hips into yours, his dick already hard against you. You pull away from his lips to catch some air. He stares at your face intently, patiently almost. You feel your cheeks flush crimson; no one has ever looked at you like that before. Gods, he was beautiful. Soft, full lips, golden brown eyes, dark luscious hair. Kylo moves his hands to your shoulders and shoves you to your knees. You lick your lips in preparation of what’s about to come. Literally. Without hesitation, you rip the thick belt off of Kylo and pull his pants down to his thighs, revealing his long underwear. You reach to pull them down too, but Kylo objects, “Don’t.” You nod at his words and pull his dick free from the restraining fabric. 

Damn. You had almost forgotten how big it is. Kylo grabs a handful of your hair and waits. You open your mouth and wrap your lips around the head, hollowing your cheeks and sucking. Your hand works at the rest of his length as you slowly ease down his member. When he touches the back of your throat, he growls deep in his chest. Kylo starts thrusting into your mouth to match the pace of your head bobbing. Your core aches with the anticipation of Kylo fucking you senseless. Gods, you were so ready for him to do it, too. Kylo continues thrusting at a fast pace, making you gag against him. He groans at the feeling and tilts his head back. 

He looks back down to you and stares at you through dark eyes clouded with lust. You moan against Kylo’s dick and it twitches in your mouth. 

He’s close. You relax your jaw and hollow your cheeks against him and he moans out loud. “Fuck,” he says. You roll your tongue against him, making his dick twitch again. Kylo starts to thrust a bit harder, hitting the back of your throat every time, his grip on your hair tightening as he does so. Within seconds, he was coming deep down your throat, spilling himself in thick ropes. You watch him as he removes himself from your mouth. “Lay down on the bed.” 

You bounce a little as your back hits the cold mattress. Kylo’s hands remove your shoes, unbuttons your pants and yank them down your legs. His slender fingers loop into your panties and drag them down your legs, staring into your eyes the whole time. You push yourself off of the bed and work at your uniform jacket. “Damn all these buttons,” you mumble. With your jacket off, you rip off your bra and fling it across the room. Kylo grabs your calves, pulling you so your ass meets the edge of the bed. Gods, he’s probably already hard again, you say mentally. Your eyes drift down Kylo’s body till his dick comes into view. Fuck, he was. He adjusts your ass till it touches his hips. 

He grabs your hips and positions himself in front of your entrance. Without warning, he slams in and starts pounding into you. You grab onto his forearms to try to balance yourself and moan out. Kylo grabs your breast, massaging and squeezing. “Kylo,” you moan loudly. Your mind wanders to your wet dream from the other night. 

_ “Say it. You’re mine.”  _

__

_ “I’m yours!”  _

_ “Use your words.” _

_ “Fuck me Kylo.” _

__ You moan again as Kylo’s hips slam into you roughly. He lets go of your breast and grabs your throat. “So that’s what you do when I’m gone,” he growls.  _ Shit _ , he heard you. He pounds into you harder. “Say it.” Kylo leans down to your face. “Say it. Tell me that no one else can do this to you. No one can fuck you like I can.” You mewl at both the fast pace of his hips and his words. “K-Kylo,” you stutter out between thrusts. 

“Do it,” he says, “Since you  _ dream _ about it.” His thumb moves to the blood vessel on your neck, adding pressure. Fuzzy black creeps into the sides of your vision, the only reminder of you being awake is his rapid thrusting. “I’m-” you pause from the lack of oxygen and blood flow, “y-yours.” Your grip on Kylo’s forearms loosens as the black in your vision grows. He realizes this and loosens his grip on your neck. Air flows back into your lungs and you take a deep breath, moaning loudly with the hard thrusting of his hips. “Good girl,” he growls lowly. 

You start whimpering as the warmth in your belly grows heavy. “Kylo,” you moan. His pointer finger dips into your mouth and you suck harshly. He pushes your thighs to your chest and resumes thrusting deep into you, fucking you at a new angle. You moan against his finger, gripping at the fabric around his arms. “Fuck!” you moan. He slaps your ass, causing you to mewl. He removes his finger from your mouth and you moan out loudly, “Gods, I’m gonna come!” Kylo moves his hand down your body and to your clit, rubbing in small circles as he continues to fuck you. 

You clench around Kylo and he growls. With a few more circles, you come around Kylo, your thighs shaking from the complete pleasure running through you. He continues to thrust into you till he comes deep into you, his hips sputtering into you. Kylo leans down and buries his face into your neck for a few minutes. When he regains his breath, he removes himself from you and walks out of the room. His seed runs out of you and down your thighs. When he comes back into the room, he has a washcloth in his hand. He opens your thighs and begins cleaning the stuff off of you. You gasp as the cloth comes into contact with your still sensitive core. 

The washcloth makes its way to the other pile of clothes. He grabs what looks to be a cloak and throws it over your naked figure. “I have to show you something.” You sit up on the bed and grab at the edges of the cloak, wrapping it around your body. Kylo kneels by the side of the bed and grabs the holocron. You’d forgotten it was even there. “Hold out your hands.” 

You hold out your hands, palms facing up, and he sets the small pyramid in your hands. It starts to glow before it lifts from your palm, the corners separating from it as it floats. Black consumes your vision before something comes to light. 

_ She wipes hot tears from her cheeks as he yells at her. “How could you feel that for me? A monster?” She squeezes her eyes shut at his words. “That’s just it, I don’t think you’re a monster! I -”  _ The woman’s voice stops, cutting out to something you can’t understand. You try to stare into the face of the man, but you can’t tell who it is. It’s just a black blob.  _ “Get out! Get away from me!” She can’t cry any more. She’s spent. “You may say that,” she says as calmly as she can, “But I know, deep from within you-”  _ And she cuts out again. 

The memory, or whatever it was, fades and your vision returns to normal. Kylo’s eyes are looking into yours, searching for some sort of response to what you just saw. “Who... _ what  _ was that?” You ask. The holocron slowly drops back into your hands, the corners going back to their places. “This is a premonition that someone, a sith lord, maybe, put into this holocron. It has been calling to me for a while now.” Your fingers trace over the metal designs on one of the faces of it. “Strange,” you say, “I couldn’t see who they were.” Kylo inhales sharply, “Neither could I.” 

You sit up fully in the bed. “Thank you for showing me. It’s interesting.” He says nothing, only stares into your eyes. “I should get going,” you mumble, “it’s getting late.” You throw your legs over the edge of the bed and stand, beginning to collect your clothes. “Wait,” Kylo says. He moves in front of you. “I have a spare room.” You look down to your feet. “Thank you, but-” He cuts you off. “Stay. I insist.” His words seem more like a demand than a question. “O-okay,” you say quietly. He leads you to the spare room and follows you inside. “If you need anything, just ask.” You look into his eyes and see something deep behind his eyes. “Thank you.”

Without another word, Kylo turns and leaves, leaving you alone for the night. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! i didn’t expect to write so much for this chapter but i didn’t want to make it stretch into another one, so here you go. i hope you enjoy and please stay for more! :)  
>  p.s. sorry if there are typos, it’s late and i just really wanted to get a chapter up!


	9. Strange and Unsettling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The holocron has left you absolutely uneasy. Spending the day with Hux and a trip to the infirmary later, this dumb holocron has proved to be nothing but trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it’s been so long! I’ve just been a little busy and trying to write this chapter has just been a teensy bit difficult. But, I’ve finally churned out something! This is also my attempt to thicken the plot just a bit so I hope it’s good!

When you woke up, you sat up in the large bed violently as your thoughts hit you in a burning hot wave. Last night with Kylo, the holocron. Your stomach shifted with discomfort and uncertainty. That holocron did not sit well with you. At all. Not only was it an ancient Sith artifact, the vision stored within it spelled out nothing but trouble to you. It was scary, almost, when you watched it. 

Something about it feels eerie, it feels like you’ve seen it before. Yet, there’s nothing specific you can grab about the people you saw. There’s no distinct voice, no piece of clothing familiar, nothing. How did Kylo feel about it? Does he know  _ more _ than you do? Probably, you think as you slap yourself mentally. Afterall, he is force-sensitive. He could feel anything if he so wanted. 

And what exactly  _ did _ he feel? Surely, this whole thing between you and him at least meant something to him if he kept it going for this long. You can’t be sure though, he is the Commander at the end of the day. Gods, why did you have to wake up with all of these thoughts? The door to the room hisses open abruptly to reveal a slightly aggravated looking Kylo. 

“What’s wrong?” You look down to separate from his gaze, “It’s the holocron,” you say quietly. “It’s bothering me.” Kylo’s expression changes to slightly worried.  _ Strange _ , you think. “Tell me.” He demands after a slightly uncomfortable silence.

You tell him all about the way it makes your stomach churn slowly and the familiarity of it all. He frowns a little as you stare at him, expectant of his answer. He only looks to the floor without saying a word. A slow aching presses it’s way to the front of your mind, suggesting an oncoming migraine. You stand from the comfortable, warm bed and slip your clothes back on. Your small fingers clutch at the thick black fabric of the cloak Kylo had lent you last night. “Why does it disturb you so much?” 

His words give you the feeling that he was invested in finding the root of your newfound stress. “I don’t know, I just woke up with this...feeling. I didn’t think much of it last night but there’s something about it. I think it’s important, somehow.” You rub your palms into your eyes and sigh heavily. “I have to go before I’m late. I’ll—I’ll talk to you later, I guess.” You push by his tall slender frame and walk to where you had come in just yesterday. You were about to walk out the door, but you stop. There it sat, the holocron. It’s like it’s looking at you, staring and  _ boring  _ into your skin. Out of thin air you slowly start hearing incoherent, soft whispers. 

Kylo walks up behind you and grabs your shoulders, ripping you from thought. “What is it?” You look up at him over your shoulder, “I-it’s nothing.” He grips your shoulder a little more, “Are you sure?” You nod quickly before running your hand over his to try and assure him you were fine. You left quickly to try and make it to Mr. Ginger before he inevitably was in another bad mood. 

~

As if you had predicted it, Hux was still in a pissy mood from the events that transpired yesterday. He had managed to get hold of a new desk that didn’t have a gaping hole in the middle of it though, so he should be glad for that at the very least. “Lieutenant.” His voice was cold as he stares you down with an equally cold glare. “Report your findings about Stigeon.” You click the heels of your shoes,  _ right,  _ you never got to give your report because of the argument he had had with Kylo. 

It took everything in you to bite back the sigh you wanted so badly to let out, and tried your best to remember the notes you had taken. Hux’s face never changed as you told him that it’s chock full of kyber crystals, but that it’s also rumored to be full of some pretty powerful Force-sensitive objects too. It’s like Hux has totally ignored what you just said as he stands, “I’ve got business to do today.” Great. More walking around. Before you both had the chance to leave, Kylo came barreling through the door. It’s like the air got sucked out of the room, you felt it for sure. He had the holocron on him. Your eyes met that visor of his and you scream at him in your head, “Why the hell do you have that thing?” 

Obviously, you can’t hear his reply because your thoughts only reach him, and nothing ever returns to you. The small, barely recognizable tilt of his head lets you know that he’s heard you loud and clear. Now, your small headache was now well on its way to becoming the dreaded migraine you knew it would soon become. But then you heard it. It’s quiet, but you can still hear it. The faint whispers work their way to your ears. Whatever were they saying? Kylo watches you as your eyes keep themselves fixed upon his jacket, you knew the holocron was in his right pocket. 

Hux’s brash voice cuts through the dead silence that had been created by Kylo’s entering. “Commander. Whatever do you need?” His voice doesn’t bother to hide the aggravation lacing his words. “Just thought I’d stop by.” Kylo’s words are equally, if not more, venomous. Hux breathes out a heavy puff of air. Gods, this was so uncomfortable. The air was so thick you could cut it with a knife. “We were just leaving,” Hux spits between gritted teeth. Nothing from Kylo. Was he just going to tag along with you and Ginger for today? Apparently so as he made no move to leave. 

As the day carried on and the three of you walked around the Finalizer, and your headache did nothing but worsen. It was taking everything in you to keep the pain from showing on your face. Kylo had long taken notice of this and kept a watchful eye on you, even hovering next to you while the both of you trailed behind Hux. On top of all of that, the holocron Kylo had brought along with him kept whispering to you. All it did was just whisper incoherent nothings at you while you walked. Its effects only worsened your migraine, making the pain you were feeling nauseating. 

Kylo continues to watch you closely as Hux carries on with whatever the hell he does. You catch his gaze numerous times, all of which you assure him mentally, “I’m okay.” You  _ know _ he doesn’t believe you by the small scoff he gives every time. The nauseating feeling sitting at the bottom of your stomach sloshes back and forth with every step you take. Gods, you wanted to just duck into a room and empty your stomach, but that wasn't an option seeing as the three of you were in the middle of a docking bay. Whichever docking bay you were in, you had absolutely  _ no fucking idea _ . All your focus was centered on not vomiting in the middle of the room in front of absolutely everyone. Kylo shoots you another look, where you do agree, “Yes, I’m not feeling okay and I know you were right. Shut up.”

He only moves closer to you to keep an even more watchful eye on you. It was around 1:30 (you have absolutely no idea, just pure guessing at this point ) before you finally admit it to yourself. You are sweating bullets and struggling to keep yourself together, and Kylo knew this too. Before you knew it, the pain in your head had grown excruciating and you couldn’t handle it anymore. In a matter of seconds you were on the ground, unresponsive. 

~

When you came to, a nurse was at your side, injecting something into the IV running into your arm. You also hear steady beeping and see a heart monitor to the right of you. The nurse sees you move slowly, watching your eyes flit around the room. “Ah, you’re awake.” Within seconds, another person was at your side, a tall dark mass.  _ Kylo _ . “Leave us.” The nurse nods respectfully and leaves the room. As soon as she’s gone, Kylo removes his mask, setting it aside, and is on you. His brown eyes trail over the details of your face, noting the paleness in your lips. “How do you feel?” He brushes the hair out of your face. “How long have I been out?” You ask slowly. The muscles in Kylo’s jaw tense, “Two hours.” Well, that wasn’t  _ too _ long. “How do you  _ feel _ ?” He presses the question further. 

“I feel a bit better, honestly.”

“You do?” 

“Yes.”

Kylo hums in what seems to be satisfaction. “How did I get here?” Gods, you hoped a whole medical team hadn’t showed up and created a huge fuss. That would be embarrassing. “I carried you here.” Your cheeks burn bright red. “T-thank you.” Kylo’s hand now rests on your shoulder as he stares into your eyes. And there it was again. That...look. You couldn’t explain it, you didn’t even know how to categorize it. But you knew it was good. 

“Not long after I brought you here, Snoke requested my presence.”  _ What?  _ You attempt to sit up in the bed but Kylo only pushes you back down by your shoulders. “What for?” He looks down, choosing his words. “He thinks…” he stops, hesitant to explain, “that what happened with you and the holocron are not coincidental. He thinks I should explore what happened.” You twiddle your thumbs nervously. But, you weren’t special. You  _ definitely  _ weren’t force sensitive, so what was wrong with you? 

“Nothings wrong with you.” You bit your tongue at his words, you really need to get used to the fact he can read your mind. “So what do I have to do then?” Kylo grabs your hands to relax them from their constant moving. 

“You have to speak to Snoke.” His words practically kicked you. You, of all people, talk to the Supreme Leader? “But I’m not important,” you try to reason, but Kylo cuts you off, “You are now. As soon as you’re discharged, we have to go meet with him.” Great. Your first two weeks as lieutenant and you had to meet the big guy.  _ Great. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If there’s anything weird or any typos, please let me know! I’ll jump back in immediately and fix it! Also let me know if you guys liked it, it means a lot to me :)


	10. Who Said I Don’t Want That?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It would just last a week, you assured yourself. A week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I tried writing this chapter a little differently and I kind of like how it came out, but i’m sorry if it seems a like a lot stuffed in or if it’s just off (but besides that I feel pretty good about it)

It was weird how Kylo stayed with you the whole night in the infirmary. Originally, you were going to be discharged about an hour after you woke up, but Kylo growled at the nurse to let you stay. Hux even dropped by, strangely enough, asking when you’d be back on duty, which made Kylo snap at him angrily. It also angered you to a degree because you had quite literally wiped out in the middle of a docking bay (you still had no clue where you were when you dropped) and all the ginger had bothered himself to ask was “When will you be back?”  _ Asshole. _

Then again, it  _ was _ Hux you were talking about, and frankly he couldn’t give a damn about anyone else. Hux also hadn’t failed to see Kylo at your side with his  _ mask off _ of all things. Though, you don’t think Kylo even cared if Hux saw the two of you together. Weird. Now, you were sitting quietly in your bed with your thick pillows while Kylo was resting peacefully in the chair next to your bed. You’d never seen him like this before, he looked so...calm. 

Why had he exactly stayed the night? He sat quietly while you fell asleep, and even took it upon himself to make you eat half a bowl of some sort of thin broth, eyeing you when you refused to eat any more. You really couldn’t help it though, the nausea had left your stomach in a state of disarray and you were honestly very incessant to try anything. But nonetheless, you ate half of it to please the dark Knight. 

Kylo was sitting upright in the chair which definitely looked like a horrible way to sleep, or nap, since you couldn’t really imagine him really taking the time to  _ sleep.  _ His arms were folded against his chest, and his breathing was quiet and soft. Your eyes linger on his face. Dark, long eyelashes fanned out over his freckled cheeks, soft hair framing his face. How the hell did someone who looks as beautiful as he did get his attention caught on you? That just didn’t click in your brain. 

A raspy voice fills your ears, “You’re still stuck on that?” You jump slightly as you stare into his now open, crisp brown eyes. “Sorry,” you mumble. You curse yourself, if only your thoughts weren’t so  _ loud _ . A nurse, definitely not the one from last night, trudges in with a look of extreme disdain, “You’re free to go.” She had definitely caught wind of Kylo’s outburst at the nurse watching over you yesterday. Poor thing. 

~

As the two of you walk down the dark, sleek halls of the Finalizer, Kylo was very close to you. So close in fact, that your arms were almost touching. Your hands were starting to clam up. The Supreme Leader was requesting  _ your _ presence, and that had your nerves shot to absolute bits. 

“Don’t be so nervous,” the metallic ting the mask gave his voice sent a chill up your spine. “I-I’m trying not to.” It’s hard, however, when you’re about to meet the Supreme  _ fucking _ Leader. Kylo shot you a look, “It won’t be that bad. I’ll be in the room with you.” That gave you a good bit of reassurance, but it still made your stomach turn at the thought. Before you knew it, the both of you were right inside a room with a hologram stationed in the middle. 

Kylo bowes towards the man in the hologram, “Supreme Leader.” Snoke makes no move to show any sign of human pleasantries. “Step forward, child.” Your heart jumps into your throat. You move forward a few steps before stopping and bowing your own head, “Supreme Leader.” He sits back further on his throne, wherever he was, and rests his chin in the palm of his hand. “My apprentice has informed me of the strange occurrence between you and this holocron,” you stiffen up as he addresses you, and you meet his hard glare. “This ability, I assume you realize, is among those sensitive with the Force. Quite rare, at that.” If you weren’t currently standing in front of the Supreme Leader, your jaw would’ve unhinged and dropped. 

“Sir, if I may, I don’t understand. How could someone like me be Force sensitive?”  _ Really? _ In the last two days, you’ve touched a holocron, heard voices coming out of it, and that’s the only worry you have? This was going wonderfully. 

Snoke’s glare intensified as his cold blue eyes picked into you. “Child, I’m not ignorant. It speaks to you, and you know it.” Your cheeks tinge red. He was right. It’s not normal for you to be listening to some glowing hunk of metal. 

You clear your mind as an attempt to calm yourself, and before you have a chance to speak, Snoke raises a hand, his long, bony fingers outstretched, “Leave us.” His voice booms throughout the room and you bolt through the door. 

~

It had been almost thirty minutes before Kylo stepped out of that room with Snoke. You barely gave him time to really notice you before you were on him, “What did he say?” 

“Snoke wants me to take you on and strengthen your ability.” At this, you stood with a confused look, “So he really thinks I’m Force-sensitive?” Kylo said nothing, but only started walking. Great. How did this even happen? Did Kylo fuck you enough to where he left some residual force power? 

“I heard that.” Your embarrassment flames your cheeks. This was so confusing. You had managed to do honest work on Starkiller, you got promoted, and now this. It had all happened so quickly, too.  _ What was Min going to say?  _ Were you even going to see him again?

You follow close behind Kylo as he darts through the black, shiny halls till you reach the training rooms. Was this really happening? Kylo leads you inside and the door shuts with a hiss. “Sit down.” There was no chair, so you sat down with your legs crossed. Kylo followed suit with his helmet positioned right by his hip. 

He closes his eyes, straightens his posture and pulls his shoulders back. You study his face as you feel the strange electric warmth flood your brain. You start to count the freckles across his cheeks, but you lose count. Somewhere around 32, maybe? His long, soft hair flows beautifully around his pale, freckled face. 

An hour goes by of you tracing the features of his face, tracing the lines in the floor, the patterns on his robes. The feeling of the invisible hands digging through your brain retreats slowly, and a pressure in your ears you didn’t know had been growing finally popped. The two of you stand, Kylo bringing his mask up with him. “Everyday in the evening we’ll have these sessions. It’ll help me understand your ability more.” You nod at his words. “Will it be like this every time?” 

He takes a breath, “No. Some days we’ll even try to expand upon it.” The two of you part ways, bidding good evening to one another. While walking to your quarters, you start thinking about Kylo. His brown eyes, long dark hair, big hands… your stomach fluttered with the thought of seeing him again tomorrow. _ Shit _ . Did you really have the hots for him? Surely, he would never return your feelings. As you made it deeper into the ship, you reassured yourself of one thing: it was just a crush and it’ll only last a week. Afterall, they  _ are _ crushes for a reason.

~

It had been a week and half of this (you also still weren’t over him, of  _ course _ your brain would confuse spending time with him everyday to mean you liked him.) Some days, Kylo would be rummaging through your head, some days he had you holding some random Force object to see if you felt anything. Kylo also seemed to abstain from face fucking you, or fucking you in general, which according to you he seemed to really enjoy doing. Which was really strange. 

But today, Kylo was teaching you some defense techniques, the basics really. Luckily you didn’t have to sweat it out in your uniform because you’d managed to find a pair of shorts and a slightly oversized t-shirt in a drawer within your quarters. “Again.” You stand in the position Kylo had shown you and prepare for him to knock you on your ass for the fifth time. Some grunts and a flip later, there you were, breathless and on your ass. 

Gods, you were so sick of this. You were trained in combat even, before you joined the First Order. But all of that was mostly using a gun, and that was absolutely useless when going up against Kylo. He beckons you closer to stand in front of him and you oblige. Whatever he said flew right out of your skull, and he hadn’t really noticed as he kept going with whatever demonstration he was doing. 

You scan his face three times over. You had to do it, you just had to. You reach up and wiggle your fingers through his dark locks to bring him down to eye level, which silenced him immediately. Kylo’s muscles tense as your lips smash into his, working against his own. You pull away, and he looks paralyzed. His eyes are wide, mouth slightly agape, muscles still tense. You take a small step back to give him some room and he still doesn’t move. He twitches a little, but remains in place. “Sorry.” 

You were turning to leave, but Kylo grabs you and pushes you into the wall. His lips ghost over yours before moving against yours softly. This was different than when Kylo would kiss and bite your lips with his dick buried inside of you. This kiss was soft and affectionate. You worked your fingers back into his hair and tug lightly. His mouth opens, and you stick your tongue in his mouth. 

This time, Kylo doesn’t bother fighting for dominance. Instead, his tongue works smoothly against your own as his hands move over your waist. In a matter of minutes, Kylo was leading you back to his quarters and into his bedroom. 

In his room, Kylo sat at the edge of his bed with you pulled into his lap. He made no move to remove his clothes or your own, all he seemed to want to do was just eat your face off. And honestly, you were fine with that. 

One of Kylo’s hands was holding you by the back of your thigh, which you did take the time to notice that if he moved it it would be right on your ass. His other hand was placed in your hair, which he used to his advantage. 

You move off of his lap and onto the edge of the bed which had Kylo gripping your waist. “What are you doing?” The muscles in his arm flex as he tries to keep you in place, he’s strangely really tense. “I’m just moving, Kylo.” You massage his hair between your fingers as your mouths work against each other, which calms him down quickly. Slowly, you start to lean back into the mattress, but Kylo’s hands press against the small of your back.

He opens his mouth to speak, but you kiss his lips softly. “It’s okay, Kylo.” You lay down all the way on the mattress, bringing Kylo to lay down on top of you. He settles himself between your thighs, and you use your legs to pull him flush to your chest. 

Kylo shifts a little on top of you and you feel something hard press into your thigh and it definitely  _ wasn’t  _ his lightsaber. You moan softly into Kylo’s mouth which makes him stiffen up again. You pull away from his lips and cup his cheek with your hand, “What’s wrong? You keep tensing up.” His dilated eyes flick from your lips to your eyes, and you look away from his gaze. “I mean, you certainly didn’t have problems with this type of thing before…”

You bonk yourself in the head mentally, why the hell would you say that? Gods, you felt like a complete idiot. “It’s not that,” he says calmly. “This time, it feels different. I know you feel it too.” You definitely had felt something between the time when he was kissing you in the training room to when he practically ate your face off on the edge of the bed.

It felt like what people in  _ relationships _ would do.

He definitely heard that, but only stares into your eyes. “I-I know you don’t want a..uhm… _ relationship,  _ though, so you don’t have to-” Kylo hushes you by smashing his lips into yours, “Who said I don’t want that?”

You didn’t know what to say, it was definitely a contrast to the moody, angry dark Knight he always was. This totally doesn’t make you scream internally because of your crush on him.

Kylo moves his lips to your jaw where he places soft, warm kisses against it. He nips at your skin which makes your breath catch. 

He stops kissing at your jaw and moves back onto your lips again. Slowly, you bring your hand down between the two of you and palm him through his pants. He groans heartily into your mouth as your fingers work him through the now tight fabric. 

“Fuck,” he says lowly. You push him up so the both of you are now kneeling on the mattress, and you peel his belt off to open his robes more. Kylo peels the thick fabric off which leaves you surprised. He’s never removed his clothes in front of you before, and you kind of accepted it, since he was Kylo. 

He also removes his pants, leaving him in just his thin, loose underclothing. You pull the band around his waist down and it slaps against his abdomen- big, hard, and waiting. You bite your lip and squeeze your thighs together at the sight, he was just  _ that _ big.

Kylo moves himself so that he’s laid out on the bed with his legs hanging over the edge and you’re seated beside him. You trail a finger down from his chest, down his stomach, and to the base of his dick.

You wrap your fingers around him and start pumping slowly, his brown eyes never leaving your own. His hand slides over the mattress to you where he grips the inside of your thigh, clenching every so often as your hand glides over him smoothly.

His lips were parted, eyes half lidded, and dark hair all over his face. Your pace quickens, and your thumb glides over the tip to collect more precum. Kylo groans loudly and thrusts into your hand to create more friction. A few more minutes, and it twitches in your hand, signaling that he’s close. 

Before you get the opportunity to continue, Kylo snatches at your wrist, and pulls your hand away. He sits up from his position on the bed and grabs the hem of your shirt, ripping it over your head and throwing it somewhere in the room. His kisses your lips hungrily while also pulling furiously at the clasp of your bra. 

You pull back from him and reach behind your back to unclasp it yourself. While you did this, Kylo sat back and waited patiently, like a child being good for a piece of candy. 

With your bra off, he certainly was excited (and he definitely did look like a kid in a candy store, given by the look in his eyes). He grabs at the small of your back and pulls you closer to him. His fingers massage your breasts, pinching and pulling your nipples while kissing you with a passionate ferocity. 

You moan into his mouth and pull at the locks of his hair. One of your hands drop to his chest, running over the hard muscles through his shirt and fisting the fabric tight in your hand. Kylo groans, “Take it off,” and you oblige. His shirt flies off in a matter of no time, and you’re left staring at his beautiful milky skin. 

Just imagining the amount of battles he’s been through and not a  _ single  _ scratch on his beautiful body. Not to mention the incredible chiseled muscles that you can’t seem to stop running your fingers over.

Kylo makes little effort of the remaining layer of clothes on his bottom half, making him absolutely and completely naked. You lay back down on the mattress and Kylo follows, hovering over you as he takes your bottom lip between his teeth. 

He rolls his hips against yours and you moan again. Without hesitation, you shimmy out of the shorts you’d found and ripped your panties off. 

His skin against yours felt amazing. Wherever his fingers went, they left a burning trail behind them, and his bare chest against yours was intoxicating. You wanted to stay like this forever, you didn’t want to leave his hold. Something prodding at your thigh had other plans, though.

Kylo moved his hands to either side of your head and lowered himself onto his forearms as he positioned himself. You wrap your arms around his neck and nod, giving him the okay.

In one swift movement, he was pressing in and filling you up, balls deep. The breath had momentarily been knocked out of your lungs, and you grip at the muscles along his shoulders before settling them back into his hair. You look into his eyes and you can see it, he’s struggling to keep himself from slamming into you this very second. But you can also see that he’s looking for your consent to move.

“Im fine, I’m fine. You’re okay.” You tuck a piece of his hair behind his ear and smile up at him, which gives him the a-okay. He pulls out slowly, relishing in the drag of your tight walls around him. He continues to just go slow, clearly enjoying the feeling of just being inside you. 

You wrap your legs around him and pull his chest tighter to yours, desperate to feel more of his skin against you. Kylo’s pace starts to quicken with every thrust as he grows more and more desperate to slam into you, and you moan into his lips as he kisses you roughly. You moan his name and he moans yours back to you.

You grip his shoulders as he slams into you, pace erratic and hips slapping together. His dick twitches in you and you know he’s close again, you are too as the warm knot in your belly grows with every thrust. “Fuck,” he moans into your neck, “fuck.” You moan his name a couple of times before you say, “Kylo, I’m close,” and he somehow thrusts deeper into you. 

One of his arms moves underneath you to press you into his body as he slams into you with more and more need. “Holy shit,” you whimper into his neck. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum too,” he moans into you as his hips become a little sloppy. One, two, three more thrusts, and you come undone around him, milking him as his hips sputter into yours.

His hips still with a quiet groan and he rests his body on top of yours for a few minutes before sliding away from you and resting next to your panting frame. 

You turn into him, legs tangling together and arms wrapping around each other. Kylo was already doing his best to ensure you would never be able to leave the lock of his arms. He sighs heavily and fatigue wears heavy on the both of you, sweat still cooling on your skin. 

He pulls a comforter over the two of you and you snuggle closer into his neck, kissing his warm skin softly before falling asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> soooooo my brain has just really been craving kylo fluff lately so i hope this was adequate. i really enjoyed writing kylo like this, and i hope you did too ! :)


	11. The Spire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Resistance is yet again on the First Order's radar, and it is now decided that a team of Stormtroopers, Kylo, and you will be heading to Stygeon Prime to stop the Resistance at all costs. Kylo also can't seem to keep his gloved hands off of you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for 170 kudos!! it means a lot, and i'm very appreciative of all of you! also, i'm sorry i haven't posted in a while, i've been quite busy and i've had lots to do lately, so i was not able to write for a good while, but here, i wrote this! honestly, i didn't know where to take it, and i promise that this fic won't just be all smut and no plot. next chapter, i promise that there will be a bunch more plot than there was in this one. i'm also in the process of trying to map out where this story is going to go, so please bear with me! p.s.: this is not read for mistakes or spelling errors so i'm sorry if anything is strange.

When you woke up, you didn’t fully realize where you were. The memories from last night flood into your brain,  _ oh _ . You turn on your side to find no one beside you, and you sigh heavily. The soft silky sheets kissed at your skin as you sit up in the massive bed. Shit. You didn't have your uniform. The only clothes you had were your shirt and shorts from last night, and those were scattered all about the room. You slip the clothes back on and walk into the living area of Kylo’s quarters, startling yourself as you find him sitting on a sleek black leather couch with a datapad in his hand. 

Gods, even as he simply sat on the couch with his legs spread, he looked like the most beautiful person in the world. With his golden brown eyes and dark wavy hair, he was stunning. “Good morning,” you say quietly. Kylo throws the datapad to the side and stands, making his way over to you. “Morning.” You shiver a little at his voice, it’s so rich and deep. Kylo raises his hands to cup your face, and you slide your smaller hands over his. 

His breath fans over your face and his eyes flit from your eyes to your lips. Kylo closes the space between the both of you and kisses you softly at first, then developing into something rough and needy. You groan as his hands slide down your waist and grip your hips roughly, sure to bring bruises across your skin. Kylo’s tongue fights your own and you groan into his mouth as he pushes you against his chest. 

You break away from the kiss and push on his chest lightly. “I can’t be late with Hux,” you mumble through kiss-swollen lips. You still needed your uniform, for fucks sake. “I got your uniform for you.” He moves over to show you your uniform, folded neatly in a little pile for you. Your lips quirk up into a small smile as you collect the clothes and press them to your chest. “Thank you,” you say as you stand on your toes to press a soft kiss to his cheek. 

In minutes, you were dressed and ready to head off to another day with Ginger, who would definitely be in a bad mood. Before you leave Kylo’s comfortable, sleek quarters, the both of you engage in a brief makeout session before you tap his arm lightly to remind him that you still have work to do. He huffs a little, but lets you go nonetheless. 

The second you were with Hux, you were whisked off to meetings of all sorts, and then even accompanied him to a rather dull war meeting. The Resistance had been off doing who knows what in the galaxy, and messed with the First Order in the process. Hux continues with his boring, monotone voice, “We’ve caught word that the Resistance is trying to get inside the Spire on Stygeon Prime.” You may not have cared much about this stupid meeting, but at least you now knew why Hux had had you decode that holomap in the first place. You turn to look at Kylo as he stood tall with his arms behind his back, much like Hux would do. Kylo’s head tilts in your direction, and you know he’s listening to you. Seems he doesn’t quite like sitting in these things either. Hux drones on, which you drown out with your own thoughts.

In your daydream, you think of Kylo and nothing else. His hands scaling up and down your body, lips nipping at your skin, rough but smooth voice… You snap out of your thoughts to try and at least understand some aspect of the meeting, and luckily you catch something interesting. “We’ll have to beat the Resistance to the Spire first, then. See what’s so important,” one of the officers retorted. Without thinking, you open your mouth to speak, “It’s an old Imperial jail. It may be old and of no use to us, but something in there is important and obviously they need it. I don’t think they'll be easy to deter either.” Everyone immediately stares at you, an uncomfortable silence falling over the room. 

Was that out of place to say? You shift uneasily on your feet at the silence, but the looks on their faces seem to be considering your statement. “Then I think we need to protect whatever the hell is in the Spire,” someone spoke up. You straighten up and push your shoulders back. They had listened. 

Conversation sprung into the room as everyone seemed to hop onto the idea of protecting the Spire. Hux quieted them down, “Then it’s settled. The Commander and a team of Stormtroopers will accompany him to the Spire.” The group was dismissed, and everyone left with the buzz of the new plan for action. Hux kept you behind, and Kylo made no move to leave either. “You’ve surprised me today, lieutenant. Good work. I’m sure that we’ll squash the plans that the Resistance have made.” You nod, “Thank you, General.” Hux turns to Kylo. “Commander. Shouldn’t you be preparing for the upcoming siege on the Spire?” 

Kylo inhales sharply, “I should.” Hux huffed as his plan to get Kylo to leave was fruitless. You stood rather awkwardly as the two men glared at each other, albeit Kylo had a mask on, but still. “She comes with me.” Kylo’s words shock you.  _ You _ , of all people, coming with him into the Spire? What purpose could you serve? Hux opens his mouth but closes it, saving himself the argument that would definitely ensue if he pressed any further. “May I ask why, Commander?” he manages to speak between gritted teeth. Kylo broadens his shoulders as he stands over Hux, “She is my apprentice, Hux, and I deem it necessary to her training.” Right. How did it fly over your head?

Now you had to go into the creepy Spire. In all honesty, that was the  _ last  _ thing you wanted to do. Hux exhales angrily. “Fine.” Without another word, Kylo leaves, only you and Hux standing in the cold room. “You and the Commander have gotten quite close as of late.” Your blood runs cold at his words. How the hell did he know? Surely, you and Kylo hadn’t been that obvious? Or maybe Hux was just being an asshole for the sake of being an asshole?

“I’m s-sorry, General, I don’t know what you mean.” He steps a little closer, “Oh come on, don’t try to hide it.” And with that, he leaves the room without another word. You suppose he left to prepare for the jump to Stygeon. It would at least take a day or two in hyperspace to come into the planet’s orbit, you guessed. Your datapad vibrates in your hand, and you look to see a mass-message to those involved in the (absolutely boring) meeting you had just gotten out of, something about preparation details for Stygeon. You put your datapad in your pocket and begin making your way to the mess hall to pick out what mess you’d be eating tonight. Gods, if they could only serve something a little more...appetizing. But it was the First Order, and they wouldn’t waste such money on better food. Maybe for the higher ups, like Hux or Kylo, but definitely not for someone eating from the mess hall.  _ Sigh _ .

As always, the mess hall had absolute crap to eat. Some meal replacement drinks, and a sandwich that you suspected had to have some sort of meat on it, but whatever you picked was bound to give you an unsatisfied feeling in your stomach later. With your tray in hand, you sat down at an empty table. Your sandwich was two thin pieces of bread with equally thin slices of mystery meat and lettuce. You had one bite left on your measly sandwich when your datapad rang beside you. It was from Kylo and read clearly: “Meet me. Now.” Attached was a room number which you supposed had to be some sort of office on one of the higher floors. 

~

The door hissed open immediately as you walked up to it, closing shut with a hiss as you strode into the room. You only laid eyes on Kylo for a few seconds before he was on you, holding your head in his hands and kissing roughly at your lips. You moan into him but he grabs at your hips and pushes you into the door. “How could you do that in there?” He groans against your lips as he rolls his hips into you. Your brow crinkles in confusion as his tongue explores your mouth. “What do you-” he bites your tongue lightly, “ahh, mean, Kylo?” He groans as you grab a fistfull of his hair. “You still seem to forget that  _ I can hear you _ .” He growls into your ear. You squeak as he lifts you up to wrap your legs around his hips before he lays you out on your back on the big desk in the room. Mental note for later: try to control your thoughts better. 

Kylo begins working on the buttons of your jacket as he nips at your jaw, his fingers making quick work of your uniform top. He tosses it to the side carelessly before yanking your bra over your head. You redirect his lips to yours to pull on his bottom lip as you begin to remove his robes, starting with his gloves and ending with the thin piece of fabric separating your fingers from his smooth chest. From outside of the durasteel door, you could have sworn you heard footsteps approaching the door. “Kylo wait,” you push on his chest, “what if someone walks in?” With doe eyes and kiss swollen lips, you look at Kylo as he massages at your breasts. “No one will walk in.” 

He bites at your lips before you stop him again, “Are you sure? I could have sworn I heard someone.” Kylo rolls into your hips and you moan quietly, “Fuck them. If someone walks in and sees, then they’ll know who you belong to.” You moan again as he plants sloppy kisses along your neck. It was kind of hot thinking that someone could walk in any moment and catch you, but the feeling of dread that washed over you had greater jurisdiction as butterflies erupted into your stomach at the thought. 

A sudden mechanical sound echoes throughout the room and you kiss Kylo’s plump lips softly, “Thank you.” He groans in response as you pull him flush to your body with your legs, and he begins to roll into you at a steady pace. You moan into him and pull on his hair, “Kylo, please,” You move one hand to the hem of your pants to try and pull them down your legs, but it was no use. Instead, you kick off your shoes. Kylo chuckles and pushes himself off of you to take your pants off, hooking his fingers into the waistband and yanking them off in one quick motion. His eyes dilate at the sight of your spread legs and soaked panties, and it’s all for  _ him _ . You blush at Kylo’s reaction and hook your leg around his waist to pull him back to you. You squirm as Kylo starts kissing your lips, then makes his way down your breasts, to the hem of your underwear, and to the inside of your thighs. 

He kisses your thighs, mouth dangerously close to your clothed heat, and bites into the soft skin. You yelp and then moan as he begins leaving wet kisses over the mark that was sure to be getting darker with every second. Kylo moves back up to your lips, then rips your panties off in one quick motion. He stuffs the shredded material into his pocket and groans as you roll your own hips against him, “Kylo,  _ please _ ,” He chuckles deeply, “Say it.” His hands run up and down your waist as he waits for you to say the words. “I need you,” He laughs, “Close enough.” He unbuttons his pants and pulls the front of his pants down, and his dick slaps against his stomach. He pulls your ass to the edge of the table and you wrap your legs around him, wrapping an arm around his neck and the other hand placed on his arm. Without warning, he pushes into you and you wince at his almost offensive size stretching you open. 

“Shit,” you mumble into his shoulder as he gives you a few seconds to get used to his size. His pace starts out slow at first, before picking up quickly, the sound of skin against skin echoing throughout the room. “Fuck!” You moan into Kylo’s shoulder as he groans into the crook of your neck. One of Kylo’s hands grips the edge of the table, knuckles white with the strength of his hold. Kylo shifts slightly and delivers one sharp thrust that makes you yelp loudly into the echo of the room. With his new angle, every thrust Kylo gives hits your cervix every time, you can practically feel him in your gut. “K-kylo you’re s-so deep,” you manage to stutter out between thrusts. “Fuck,” Kylo groans lowly. 

Kylo moves a hand between your bodies to rub circles into your clit, giving you even more stimulation. Your legs start shaking against Kylo and he knows you're close. “H-harder,” you mumble into his neck. He slams into you more, making the desk screech against the floor twice. Weren’t these desks supposed to be bolted into the floor or something? 

“Ah, Kylo, I’m close,” you moan. Kylo’s hips stutter, but he keeps the rough pace going. His thumb rubbed one particular circle into you and you came around him, everything going white and your whole body shaking. Kylo thrusted into you a few more times before he came in you, hips sputtering and breath shuddery as he groaned into your neck. As he laid on top of you, you played with his hair in between your fingers, wiping the sweaty strands off of his face when he lifted his head to look at you. He kissed your lips softly before pulling out and tucking himself back into his pants. You groan quietly at the feeling of being empty, and his seed runs down your thighs. The both of you dress, you just sucking it up and pulling your pants up with no panties underneath. What a horrible feeling. “I’ll see you tomorrow?” you ask as he slides his belt around his waist. He nods, “Of course.” 

You kiss him before parting ways, legs a little wobbly and mind in a daze. Before going to bed, you took a brisk shower to get the stickiness off of your thighs. Your fingers ran over the bite mark Kylo had left, the dark mark aching under your touch, but you didn’t mind. As you climbed into your bed, all you thought of before falling asleep was Kylo, and you fell into a deep sleep with nothing but him across your mind. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really hope you enjoyed this chapter! like i said at the beginning, i'm gonna try to thicken the plot next chapter so i'm going to try and work on that as much as possible, although i'm still quite busy with other matters so i don't know when the next chapter will be up, but please bear with me lol. anyways, i really hope you keep reading and that you enjoy what's to come!


	12. Yes, Commander

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Besides the fact that he was quite busy with things on the Finalizer, most of the time his thoughts were on you. Everything he thought of somehow led back to you, and he couldn’t stop it. Every night now he would think of your smile, the way you looked at him, your lips against his, everything. But he couldn’t exactly tell you that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yay another update! thanks so much for almost 200 kudos now, it’s great knowing there are people who enjoy this story. it’s also crazy to see that 4000 people have seen this little thing that i created on a whim. thanks so much!

It was about four in the morning when you woke up to the sound of the hatch to your room opening. You turn slowly, squinting to see the dark figure looming over your bed. “Kylo,” you mumble, and with outstretched hands, you pull him down onto the mattress to lay next to you. 

One of his arms snakes around your waist, the other pulling your thigh to rest on his hip, his hand resting on your thigh. “What’s wrong?” you say quietly, sleep threatening to pull you back into its embrace. You stroke his cheek, pulling hair out of his face to smooth his dark locks back. “I couldn’t sleep.” His deep voice vibrates through you from the proximity of your bodies. Confusion knits your brows together, “Are you okay? What’s wrong?” 

Kylo usually never slept for very long, the most he could probably go was maybe five hours, and even that was an estimate. He presses himself closer against you and rests his head in the crook of your neck. “I just have a lot on my mind.” Kylo  _ did _ have a lot on his mind. Besides the fact that he was quite busy with things on the Finalizer, most of the time his thoughts were on you. Everything he thought of somehow led back to you, and he couldn’t stop it. Every night now he would think of your smile, the way you looked at him, your lips against his,  _ everything.  _ But he couldn’t exactly tell you that. Your lips turn down at the corners slightly, and your fingers curl through his hair more, “You can tell me, you know.” He nods his head, but remains quiet. 

“Kylo, try to get some sleep. Please.” You pull some of the blanket over his shoulders and he says nothing. You continue to slowly card through his hair as he falls asleep, soft breaths falling from his lips. You place a kiss on the crown of his head before falling back asleep. 

~

When you woke up, you were flat on your stomach, with Kylo’s chest pressed flush against your back. You were surprised, for one, because Kylo  _ always _ gets up before you. Maybe he really just needed to cuddle up with you to have a good night’s sleep. Your heart swells at the thought. 

Although, you had a problem. Kylo was quite literally on top of you, rendering you unable to get up. You pull at the arm still wrapped around your waist and it flops down beside you. This was gonna be harder than you thought. 

You wiggled under Kylo to try and slide out from under him, but were stopped when a hand gripped your waist and a pair of hips starting to press into your backside. “Is this how you planned to wake me?” His deep morning voice is right in your ear, and you clamp your thighs together. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up.” Kylo chuckles lowly, “It’s quite alright, love.” Butterflies erupt in your stomach and you breathe arily, “W-well, I was just going to go get breakfast,” you mumble as Kylo begins pressing wet kisses down the side of your neck. 

You whine at the feeling but pat the hand that had snaked its way to your throat. “Kylo, we can’t do this now, we’ve got to get ready for our leave to Stygeon.” Kylo nips a little more at your skin, but relents, nonetheless. He flips onto his back and you straddle his thighs to press kisses to his soft lips. “You can stay here if you want,” you say before slipping off of him to put your clothes on. He grabs your wrist before you leave, “I’ll handle you when we get back from Stygeon.” 

“Y-yes, Kylo,” you stammer on your words, and Kylo growls, “Yes  _ what _ ?” You swallow thickly, “Yes, sir.” He releases his hold on you and you continue on your way to the mess hall. You stabbed at the bowl of grey porridge with your spoon and sighed in distaste. Breakfast really was one of their worst meals. You disposed of it quite quickly, ready to get rid of the gross meal.

You were walking down the sleek halls of the Finalizer when you found Kylo just up the corridor, speaking with Hux.  _ Fuck _ , you thought. Hux was probably telling him what he told you yesterday, and you were going to be in  _ big  _ trouble. This couldn’t be good. You darted to the side of the hallway and crept a little closer, hiding behind a durasteel support beam to eavesdrop. 

“How is she even going to be ready for this, Ren? So what she may be your apprentice, she’s just a woman. You know, if you continue to let your  _ feelings  _ get in the way of-” and Kylo had had enough. Hux was against the wall in a second, Kylo’s hand outstretched, the Force closing tighter around his throat by the second. “You dare criticize me for  _ my _ decisions again, and I’ll have you jettisoned into space. As for  _ her _ ,” and Kylo’s head turns to the side a little, and you meet the corner of his visor, “you dare talk about her like that again and I’ll see to it personally that you’re ripped to shreds before my very eyes.”

Hux drops to the floor, face purple and choking as he takes deep but cracked breaths. Kylo leaves him and finds your place by the support beam. You stare at him through the mask, “Is he going to be okay?” You ask him. Kylo continues to walk, beckoning you to his side. “For now, he will be.” He takes long strides as you both walk down the halls. “Are you ready for Stygeon?” The voice coming through the mask sends a shiver up your spine. “Yes,  _ Commander _ ,” you accentuate the word as a couple of stormtroopers walk past. 

The two of you walk up a flight of stairs and past the medical wing, speeding past nurses and doctors. “Where are we going?” You ask as you run a little to keep up with him. “The Command Shuttle. I’ve already had your bag packed on board.” As you make your way to the docking bay, the both of you walk by a couple of officers who snicker as you brush by them. Kylo comes to a complete halt and turns to the men, stalking up to the one on the right. He grabs him by the neck and drags him up the wall, mouth close to his ear and voice too quiet for you to hear. 

He drops the guy and he throws a look to the other, the both of them scuttling down the hall in fear. “Kylo, what was that?” You ask as he takes his place by your side again. “Don’t worry about it.” He says darkly. You frown a little, “Please tell me.” You look at him with doe eyes and he sighs deeply, “Just know that if  _ anyone  _ looks at you, touches you, says something to you, or even remotely thinks something about you that  _ I _ do not like, they will meet a very untimely end.” You gulp loudly as he continues walking into the docking bay and up to the stormtroopers standing in front, waiting to board. 

The troopers give Kylo a quiet “Commander,” as he strolls up the ramp of the now fixed ship. They did a hell of a job fixing this thing, seeing as last time it came crashing in here it was a heaping pile of junk. The troopers give you a look before nodding at you in some form of respect as they see you’re with Kylo and you run up the ramp. 

You’d only been in the Command Shuttle once, and it was just as sleek and cool as you remembered. The interior was beautifully designed, you noted, and you walked up to Kylo who was at the console. “I hope this goes well,” you tell Kylo. He looks at you through his mask, “It will. I’ll make sure of it.” You sigh and clasp your hands behind your back. “I just don’t want it to get too...bloody.” Kylo’s hands move to his helmet and the locks hiss, and he sets the helmet in the pilot's chair. He presses a kiss to your forehead before putting the helmet back on and marching back down the ramp. 

At the bottom was Hux, who looked like he was about to pass out from how red his face was. “Commander,” he choked his own pride back down, “I hope your endeavor is successful.” Kylo says nothing, only stands stoically in front of the ginger. Hux turns to you, his face twisting a little, “Lieutenant.” The word came out in what sounded like a snarl. “General,” you said quietly. Kylo pushes his shoulders back to tower over Hux even more, “I suspect that you have duties elsewhere, Hux.” 

Without another word, Hux huffes and storms off, two stormtroopers following behind him.  _ He’s such a fucking dick,  _ you think to yourself. Kylo looks at you and you hear his voice in your head,  _ Such a filthy mouth, _ he says before pacing back up the ramp. 

In thirty minutes, everything and everyone needed was loaded onto the Command Shuttle and ready for takeoff. Kylo piloted while you sat in the back with all of the stormtroopers. They seemed relaxed for the most part, which seemed to put you a little more at ease with the whole situation. If they weren’t too worried, then you didn’t have a reason to be. Before you knew it, you were in hyperspace, heading to Stygeon with no idea of what was to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you enjoyed this chapter! i keep thinking about where i want this story to go atm and i just hope i can create something enjoyable lmao. anyways, i hope you stay around for more updates!


	13. A Second Lightsaber

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You climbed further into the dark woods. Red and blue lights came into view and reflected off of the snow. You hid behind a tree to watch the scene unraveling before you. Kylo’s helmet was off, his lightsaber ignited, but then you saw it. The girl was standing in front of him, a lightsaber of her own was lit and blazing with blue light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry it’s been so long since i updated, i’ve been busy. also, thank you so much for 200 kudos! it means a lot that people liked my story enough to send a kudo. also, please forgive me for any misspellings or grammatical errors!

The Command Shuttle had surprisingly come out of hyperspace only after just a few hours of being on board. Like you had said the other day, hyperspace was something you, who wasn’t a pilot or anything like that, didn't know how to time. After about the first hour or two, your butt started to hurt from sitting for so long. You shifted back and forth in your seat as the ship whirred and creaked every so often. Maybe you should have gone to the very quiet data room aboard the Finalizer and plucked a book off the shelves to keep you occupied. Would have helped with the boredom at least.

The stormtroopers seemed to be engaging in small talk with each other, none of them casting so much as a glance in your direction. The only time one had ever spoken to you before was when you were out on Starkiller late at night past curfew. It was a one time mistake. You stand from your position on the metal chair, legs sore from being still, and walk away from the stormtroopers. A few of them gave you looks, but you ignored them. You walked to the bridge of the shuttle where Kylo sat in the pilot's chair, navigating to steer through Stygeon’s atmosphere. The planet was absolutely desolate. Not a single soul was in sight as Kylo landed the ship in a small field in the trees, right at the base of the Spire. 

“So that’s it, hmm?” You ask from behind his chair. Kylo hums in response before powering down the ship. You looked out the large window of the shuttle and stared at the snow laid everywhere. You should have brought one of your insulated uniform jackets. “Follow me.” Kylo stood from the chair and brought you to a medium sized room (for a shuttle) that had two cots on one side of it and to a large cabinet. He opens it, revealing various sets of armor along with cloaks and robes, all quite similar to his own. He pulls a large bundle of fabric from the cabinet and lays it in your arms before closing it shut. “Put this on.” 

You throw the cloak around your shoulders and buckle the black clasps. The fabric flows around you gently before settling, the length dragging on the ground slightly.

Kylo stands behind you as you examine yourself, smirking under his mask. “I look so fucking cool,” you say to him as you turn to face him. His chuckle filters out through the mask. “I can have you fitted with your own when we get back to the Finalizer.” You widen your eyes a little, “Really?” he nods in response.  _ Awesome _ , you thought. Kylo moves somewhere else in the room, you continue to examine your new look, and he brings back a blaster. 

“I suppose they taught you combat at the Academy?” You nod and place the blaster in the holster strapped to your thigh, the barrel tapping your leg every so often.

The both of you walk out to meet with the stormtroopers before you embark on the journey up to the Spire. The stormtroopers jumped a little at your new appearance, helmets flicking from Kylo then back to you. “Don’t fail the First Order today,” is all Kylo says as the ramp lowers and everyone makes their way off the ship. 

The cold air hits your face harshly, Kylo obviously having no reaction. The troopers seem to be a little chilled as the wind sneaks its way into the cracks of their armor and onto their skin. You look up, and above is the Spire. Multiple towers stand tall off the mountain, each one different heights than the others. You shiver as the wind whips around you. At the base of the mountain, you see a hatch that’s about ten foot tall with a width of maybe fifteen. 

Kylo is already marching towards it, and you follow, the stormtroopers preparing for the impending battle. The door opens, an eerie feeling settling in your stomach and you both step inside of the hatch. It leads to nowhere, it’s just a room. The floor shifts, however, and starts moving up the mountain to the Spire. The feeling in your stomach deepens and your stomach flips as the floor stops, the doors opening to reveal endless hallways, one particular passage leading to look out upon the mountainous terrain of the planet. This planet was  _ not _ growing on you, to say the very least. 

You walked to the balcony of the fortress while Kylo made his way deep into the Spire. Part of you couldn’t believe this was happening. At the Academy, they had trained you in combat, but they always reminded you that none of you would ever make it onto a battlefield. Only the ones training to be stormtroopers or the people training for the specialized units would ever be able to step foot onto battle grounds. Yet here you were. You looked down below you to see the stormtroopers sitting behind barricades they’d put up, waiting. Some of them talked to one another quietly, but that was mostly it. 

A ship came out of orbit and stayed in the air, the people inside realizing we had beat them to it. Their ship landed, disappearing into the trees, until four people emerged from the dense forest. The stormtroopers jumped to action, blasters firing in all directions. Your mind screamed for you to jump to action, so you ran down the corridor and into the lift, riding down to the base of the mountain. 

As soon as the blast doors opened, you lept out and behind a barricade, blaster now in hand. “Shit,” you cursed as beams of light shot out everywhere around you. The stormtrooper next to you only stared at you through the mask, grunting as blaster shots made the barricade rumble. When you take in your surroundings, quite a few stormtroopers lie still in the snow, dark pools of blood staining the pure ice. It made you shiver. Suddenly, a girl runs across the field, dodging shots and ducking behind trees. The two men who had accompanied the girl shot down a few more stormtroopers, even the one beside you finally falling to the ground. 

You shuddered again and continued on; your blaster growing hot from the continuous shots being fired. One of the men ducked back into the trees and out of sight, leaving the other behind. The remaining stormtroopers walked forward and grabbed hold of the man. His arms were forced behind his back and the stormtroopers brought him on board the Command Shuttle. But there was still something wrong: that girl was still in the woods and Kylo had yet to come out of the Spire. 

The cold wind whipped you in the face as you stood in the field, cheeks and nose tinged pink. You focused your thoughts, just like Kylo had taught you in the previous weeks, and you felt his presence. You kneeled in the snow to try and get more focus on him, but something was off. You pushed your fingers into the snow and ignored the cold threatening to bite them off and pushed harder. Kylo’s presence was bigger this time, stronger, and you felt his anger pour through you. 

A strange feeling wormed its way into your core and you grabbed onto it, and suddenly you were in the middle of the dense forest. You stood, wiped the snow off of your fingers, and looked around you. There was the forest, but as you turned around, you were still in the field littered with dead stormtroopers. Something echoed throughout the woods and your head jerked towards the noise, but you saw nothing. You climbed further into the dark woods. Red and blue lights came into view and reflected off of the snow. You hid behind a tree to watch the scene unraveling before you. Kylo’s helmet was off, his lightsaber ignited, but then you saw it. The girl was standing in front of him, a lightsaber of her own was lit and blazing with blue light. 

You gasped quietly as she raised her blade and swung down on Kylo, his own saber coming into contact with hers with a sharp whine from the cauterizing swords. Kylo’s anger swelled in his chest and he backed up, only to stab his blade at her, but she deflected. She growls as she fights to keep herself from being sliced in half, Kylo falling back from the force of her saber colliding with his own. He got back up and she swung her blade. Kylo fell to the ground in agony with blood smearing his face, a line from his forehead to his cheek seeping with blood.  _ Dammit _ , you thought. You had to do something.  _ Or else Kylo could die. _ Your fingers wrapped around the trigger of your blaster and you aimed for the girl, and counted.  _ 1, 2, 3… _ , and you fired. Her lightsaber swung around and came into contact with the bolt from your blaster, and reflected your shot back at you. Your blaster melted into a pile of fiery metal, rendering it utterly useless. 

“Come out of the shadows!” She yelled through the trees, her accent flowing smoothly despite her cracked voice. You stepped over a fallen tree, no doubt a product of Kylo’s saber, and Kylo groaned as you stepped in front of him. You push your shoulders back and hold your head high, “Who are you?” You hope your voice cuts through her. “I don’t have to tell you anything!” Her teeth are clenched together as she holds her lightsaber up higher. You feel her anger flowing through her and realize she’s an open book in her emotional state. You do your best to push into her thoughts, but she shuts you out quickly. “Get out of my head,” she spits. But you’d already gotten something.

You turn your head to look at Kylo behind you, sweat and snow covering his face and mixing with his blood. Besides him, you see his lightsaber laying in the snow. “Don’t think about it,” she growls. You chuckle, “I should tell you the same thing,  _ Rey _ .” Her face twists into disgust as her name falls past your lips. “You don’t get to call me that.” Her lightsaber pushes closer to you, and you back up closer to Kylo. “I don’t want to do this,” you say lowly, “I just want to go.” Rey doesn’t move, she only squints her eyes in anger at you. 

Slowly, you stretch your hand out, your fingers reaching towards the snow, and Kylo’s lightsaber flies into your hand, igniting within a second. Rey lunges forward, and you block her blow. You push her back and spin Kylo’s lightsaber around you, the weight of it empowering. Rey breathes heavily and points her lightsaber towards the snow, and you speak to her. “Why did you come here?” She steadies herself on her feet and flat out ignores you. You raise Kylo’s lightsaber and swing down, a bloody line forming on her upper arm. Rey cries out in agony and grips her arm tightly. She runs to you with both hands around the lightsaber now and swings down on you, your blocks almost unsuccessful. “I don’t have anything against you,” you growl between blocks, “just tell me why you came and I’ll leave, and you’ll still have your life.” 

Rey snarls, “And let you take him away so he can get better and kill even more people? Never.” You sigh heavily. “Very well.” Your arms grow tired as Rey doesn’t stop swinging. Anger solely fuels her, but your energy is draining faster and faster. Rey swings one more time before you miss her blade, and her lightsaber plunges into your stomach. You let out a strangled cry as tears sting your cheeks and blood pours out of the wound, and Rey gasps. Her lightsaber deactivates and you fall to your knees, eyes wide and burning. Rey kneels in front of you, regret filling her features. Kylo groans from behind you and you know he can feel your pain. Your fingers touch the wound in your stomach and blood sleeps out even more, covering your thighs and hand. ”Holy shit,” you mumble before falling on your back.

A voice calls from the forest, yelling Rey’s name. She turns to it, “She’s dying!” Blood poured out of the sides of your mouth as you choked out, “Like you cared before,” in between shallow breaths. The man calls again, “Just leave her, we have to get out of here!” Rey still doesn’t make a move to leave you, a battle of morals raging in her mind. The man walks up to the both of you and grabs her shoulders, dragging her away saying, “We have to get back to the base. The General needs us.” The two of them disappear into the forest, and blood splatters your face as you cough up more blood. Your vision fades into black as you feel the clutches of death wrapping around you. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sooooo....i know it’s a cliff hangar but i just had to lol. and i hope y’all caught the little force connection that i wrote in! the thought occurred to me while writing and i really wanted to write it.


	14. The Medbay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You had to know if he was alive. The hand on your shoulder fell back to her side, and she took in a sharp breath, “A week. At the very least.” The woman could see the thoughts running wild through your mind. A week, you thought. A whole week, and you still had no idea where Kylo was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry it’s been a while, i had no idea where to go with this and i’ve been busy. also just been kinda sad lately, so i had to take a moment. always remember to take care of yourself, everybody. hope you enjoy the chapter

Where...were you? There was a pain in your abdomen that  _ wouldn’t  _ go away, albeit it felt much better than when there was a lightsaber buried inside of your stomach. You moved your right arm to feel around you, but a sharp, electric pain shot through your side and consequently the wound in your middle. Tears leaked over your cheeks and you let out a quiet sob. Your eyes crack open slowly and you wince from the bright light in the room. 

Did you somehow get back to the Finalizer? And where was Kylo? At the moment, the painkillers and medicine that were without a doubt flowing through your system made you drowsy and only made you want to fall back asleep. But you had to find Kylo. You had to know he was okay. You found a remote on the side of the medical bed and pressed the button labeled ‘up’. You groaned in pain as the bed slowly made its way to sit you up. By the time you’d swung your legs over the edge of the bed and your feet touched the cold floor, a woman in a doctor’s coat was in the room and getting you back into bed. 

“Miss, please don’t move, you’re going to seriously hurt yourself.” Warm tears flowed down your cheeks as the pain in your belly failed to subside. “Where am I?” Your voice came out in a cracked, broken whisper from lack of use. The woman took a needle and inserted it into the IV running into your arm. She tossed it into the biohazard bin when she was done. “You’re back on the Finalizer, miss.” You licked your cracked lips, “How did I- how long have I-” You couldn’t even form a proper sentence. The woman rested her hand on your shoulder and gave you a reassuring smile, “You’ve been asleep for four days. We had to regrow almost everything in your abdomen because of that nasty lightsaber wound. You’ll be fine, you just need to rest for a little while longer.”

You groaned as you felt the medicine she had administered working through your system. “H-how much l-longer do I have to stay here?” You had to get out of here to see how Kylo was doing. You had to know if he was  _ alive _ . The hand on your shoulder fell back to her side, and she took in a sharp breath, “A week. At the very least.” The woman could see the thoughts running wild through your mind. A week, you thought. A whole week, and you still had no idea where Kylo was. You sighed in aggravation before the nurse stepped away from your bed and off to the side, finding a clipboard and writing down small notes. Before you had the chance to speak, the nurse was bidding you get some rest and was out of the door. 

~

You woke up with a jolt, a groan following afterwards. Something was wrong. Something felt...off. You couldn’t explain it. And you  _ still _ had yet to find Kylo. Beyond the door to your room, you hear bustling voices along with yells of agony. Footsteps never seemed to stop running past your door, even after a few hours. No one, not even a nurse, ever stepped foot into your room for a good portion of the day. You couldn’t even tell if it  _ was _ day. You tried to find Kylo through the Force, but in your weakened state, you could only feel the pain and agony seeping into the medbay of the Finalizer. 

Stiffness spread through your body as you sat in your bed, your bed being equally uncomfortable, and you painfully pushed yourself to sit up. You breathed through the pain radiating through your middle and slipped off the edge of the bed, your toes slowly meeting the cold floor. You grabbed the IV pole next to your bed and brought it along with you as you stepped through the door of your room. There weren't as many people roaming the halls as you heard earlier, but there were still people littered about the halls. Some were in beds, groaning quietly. Others sped walked around you, paying you no mind. 

Down the hall, there was a wide area filled with hundreds of injured people laying in beds. Curtains were the only thing that sectioned them off from one another. Your stomach twisted. What the hell happened while you were asleep? How long were you asleep for that matter? A woman came up to you and grabbed your arm softly, “Miss, are you okay? Where are you supposed to be?” The wound in your stomach started to ache, and you totally ignored her question. “What happened?” 

Her face dropped and paled, and she was quiet, “You don’t…you don’t know?” You shook your head slowly, “No. I don’t.” Whatever you were about to hear, you weren’t going to like it. She cleared her throat, her arm dropping to her side, “Starkiller base was destroyed.” You took in a sharp breath at her words. It didn’t seem true. “The Resistance, they came and found something, a weakness I guess, and it just...blew up.” Your mouth dried at the thought. It was hard to comprehend. Your  _ best friend _ was on Starkiller, he couldn’t have just…died. You gripped onto the IV pole with both hands like it was the only thing keeping you grounded.  _ Min _ . He couldn’t be dead. You felt guilty. All you had done on the Finalizer was run after Kylo like a little puppy and you’d never even stopped to _think_ about your best friend.

Tears fell down your cheeks as you cried softly, the woman in front of you also feeling a ping of sadness hit her heart. “You’re a nurse, right?” You said as she studied your sad features, and she nodded. “I have a friend, Min Dallinger, he was on Starkiller. Have you seen him? Treated him?” She glanced at the beds in the large room, to the floor, and back to you. “I haven’t met anyone of that name. I’m sorry.” A hole punched itself through your chest at her words. He couldn’t just be dead. He had to be alive. “Let me walk you back to your room,” she says quietly. You took a shaky step back as she reached for you. 

“I have to find him,” you sniffled. A sad expression splayed across her face at your words. “It’s okay, you’ll find him,” she reassured, “but first, let me just take you back to your room.” Once back in the cold box of your room and back into the uncomfortable bed you’d been in for the past week, you just sat there. The nurse tried to console you, but nothing really helped. First, you had to try and find out if Kylo was alive, and now this. And it just sat and ate at you. The woman had managed to get a bowl of soup brought to your room, seeing as you haven’t really eaten anything lately. You spun the cold spoon around in your fingers as she checked the clipboard on the counter. 

You studied her frame while you ate at the soup slowly. She looked to be about your age, maybe a year or two younger. “You look a bit young to be a nurse,” you said out loud without thinking. Her head shot up to look at you, “Yeah, I haven’t finished my training yet, I’ve got a few months left. They put a lot of med students on to take care of the patients here.” You took another sip of the broth. “You were training on Starkiller, weren’t you?” She looked to her feat at the mention of the fallen base. You yourself were still in a bit of shock at the news. “Y-yeah, I was.” 

A silence fell over the both of you, filling the room with nothing but cold air. “I have to go. More patients to see,” she mumbled as she made her way to the door. “Wait,” she halted in her footsteps and turned back to you. “What’s your name?” A small but still sad smile tugged at the corners of her lips. “It’s Frances.” You hoped she would agree to what you were about to say next. “Can you promise me something, Frances?” Her eyebrow raised a little and you continued: “Promise me you’ll help me find my friend.” Her eyes went back and forth over the floor before she looked back up to you. She knew how important this was for you. “I promise.” And you knew she meant it. She left without another word, going off to treat more of the wounded from Starkiller. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if any questions from last chapter (like why kylo just kinda laid there) weren’t answered, they will be in the next chapter. sorry if there are any grammatical errors
> 
> i seriously rewrote this about four times cause i was so indecisive, but this is what popped out. lemme know what y’all think :)


	15. It Wouldn’t Be Easy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Once inside your room, Kylo seemed to just linger. He didn’t want to leave you in this awful room. You sat at the edge of your bed, fingers tracing the pattern on the sheets, “Thank you for walking me back.” He nods, his lips are pressed into a thin line. He stands in front of you and looks to your bed. “Is this even comfortable?” The corners of your lips tilt downward in the slightest at his words. “Not that much, no.” Kylo frowns at this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey peeps. it’s been a while since i’ve uploaded a new chapter, but a lot of the time i’m trying to think of where to lead the story, and i just get stuck haha 
> 
> but anyways i hope you enjoy this chapter!

You woke up in the middle of the night to the soft whirs of the Finalizer as the ship floated throughout space. The aching in your body was only growing more unbearable with each passing  hour you spent in that horrible bed. You stood up and away from the mattress, your core developing a pain. You gripped the cold metal of the IV pole and brought it with you and past the door of your room. Your feet took you on quite a long walk throughout the ship. It must have been an hour that had passed before you came to a sectioned portion of the ship, an area that not many walked through daily. You followed the invisible trail your mind was leading you until you came up to a door and stepped through the threshold. 

The room was definitely not used, there was a couch and chair that were covered in black drapes to protect the pieces from dust. On the opposite wall from the couch was a bookshelf, with hundreds of books. But beyond the furniture was a large window showing nothing but the beautiful emptiness of space. The stars sparkled and the planets gave off bright colors in the distance. You walked to the window, IV pole in hand, and just stood there, watching it all go by. The view of space calmed your mind, set you at ease from all the emotional turmoil that had been going through your mind. It didn’t last as long as you would have liked. You imagined what Ilum would look like now: icy bits and pieces shooting off into many directions from the explosion, the remnants of Starkiller base nothing else but a burning heap in the middle of space. You sighed. Min had promised that you’d see him again. Now, you didn’t even know if he had maken it out in time. You’d been so lost in thought that you didn't even realize there was a presence other than yours in the room, a sad and pained one at that. You turned slowly, only to find Kylo standing two feet away from you. You gasped as your grip on the pole tightened. Kylo looked like he hadn’t slept in weeks. His bottom lip trembled, his eyes red, cheeks damp. A scar from where he was struck made its way from his forehead to the base of his neck, a black piece of stitching filled the gap in his cheek. 

You threw your arms around his neck, bringing his trembling frame down to rest against your body, being mindful of your still healing wound. You let out a shuddery breathe against his shoulder as an arm moved to the small of your back, the fingers attached to it trembling. “I thought you were dead.” Kylo’s body only stiffened and shook a little more at your words. You didn’t want to let go of him. It felt like you would fall if you did. Your name falls from his lips in a shudder, the pain from his mind filling the room. For a few seconds, you stood there, holding him in your arms. 

After a little bit longer, you pulled away from him to look him in the eyes. Slowly, you brought your hand to his cheek and cupped it. You swiped across his cheekbone with your thumb and his eyes fluttered at your touch. Kylo studied your features. You looked tired, so very,  _ very _ , tired. You had dark circles the size of moons. Bruises decorated your arm where the doctors had replaced the IV needles. It was hard for Kylo not to fall to his knees and cry right in front of you. Yet, he so desperately wanted to be angry. Angry at you for almost getting yourself killed, but angry at himself for letting you get hurt. He wanted the hurt and pain to build so he could tear the room apart. But… he couldn’t. All that occupied his mind was the torment ripping his resolve to pieces. 

And while you could feel the sadness pouring off of him like heavy rain, you had no idea what he had done. What Snoke made him do. “Do you want to sit down?” Kylo’s eyes darted to the IV pole beside you and back to your face. He nodded slowly and followed close behind you as you walked to the right side of the couch and sat down gently, trying not to aggravate your wound too much. Kylo sat down next to you, careful to give you space. You frowned as he only sat with his elbows on his knees, head in his palms. “You don’t look too comfortable, Kylo.” Your voice was quiet and soft, which Kylo had missed so much. 

He almost hated himself for doing so. It wasn’t like him to be sweet and nice. But he pushed those thoughts aside and listened to you. “I’m okay, if you’re mad. I know you don’t like when people interfere-” his own voice, cracked and deep, spoke. “I’m not mad at you. It’s my fault.  _ My  _ fault that you're in the infirmary now.” His bottom lip started trembling again. You put your hand on his back and rubbed up and down. “It’s not your fault Kylo, I’m the one who stepped in.” He shook his head. 

“But it is. If I had just gotten up, fought back, you wouldn’t be hurt. But I didn’t get up. I was weak.” You pulled his shoulder to turn him towards you so you could look into his eyes. “Kylo, please stop beating yourself up about it, it was my dumb decision. Not yours.” He sighed shakily. He didn’t want to argue with you. Not now. “I’m just glad that you're not dead, Kylo. I mean, she cut into your face, I don’t think I’d want to get up after that either.” Kylo only shook his head at your words. 

Kylo never said anything else. He didn’t want to say anything else. His throat had this aching, this  _ horrible  _ ache that told him he was close to breaking. When had he ever started caring for people? This wasn’t him. He was Kylo Ren, Commander of the First Order. This wasn’t like him at all. But somehow, he’d lost himself in your voice. He’d lost himself in your eyes, the way you looked at him, your smile. As he thought these things, he remembered how foreign this all was. He had never felt this for someone, and it was hard to believe he’d managed to let himself get comfortable in your warm and welcoming embrace. 

But he did. And he didn’t know how much longer he could deny that fact. There was no telling how long he could keep these thoughts sheltered from Snoke. “Look, Kylo, I should probably go back to my room. The nurse might be looking for me or something.” Kylo shuffled to his feet and he looked out at the stars. It had been a while since he’d really stopped to admire it. He’d really forgotten how much he enjoyed just  _ looking _ at the sparkling stars in the galaxy beyond. He guesses that it’s something you're bringing out in him. “Let me walk with you,” he mumbles, breath and voice still shaky. You try to stand, but it was a bit harder for you since the couch was much lower to the ground than your hospital bed. 

He hovered over you and placed a hand on your back, holding his free arm out for you to grab his bicep. The wound in your middle shot a pain through you as you slowly rose to your own feet. “How does it feel?” Kylo’s voice makes you look into his eyes. Pain swam through them and held them hostage. “It’s.. getting better.” Your answer doesn’t seem to put Kylo at any more ease. You grabbed hold of the IV pole and the both of you made your way through the empty halls of the Finalizer. 

There were no words exchanged. You would only look to Kylo and examine his muscular frame, trying to understand at all, in the  _ least _ , anything that he was feeling. Once inside your room, Kylo seemed to just linger. He didn’t want to leave you in this awful room. You sat at the edge of your bed, fingers tracing the pattern on the sheets, “Thank you for walking me back.” He nods, his lips are pressed into a thin line. He stands in front of you and looks to your bed. “Is this even comfortable?” The corners of your lips tilt downward in the slightest at his words. “Not that much, no.” Kylo frowns at this, “I can have something arranged, if you’d like.” Images flash in your mind of being in the comfort of your own room, albeit it’s small, it felt more comfortable than this stuffy ass room. 

“I’d like that, thank you.” You gave a small smile as he looked into your eyes. “You should get some rest, you’re still healing.” Kylo makes a move to leave, but you grab his hand; it’s cold to the touch. He turns back to you, and you pull him down closer to your face. “Goodnight Kylo, go get some rest.” You press a kiss to his cheek and squeeze his hand lightly. “Goodnight,” he mumbles, and leaves. 

As you laid down in your bed and pulled the blankets up to your chin, you couldn’t help but sigh. Conversation had felt so stiff, you felt bad. And he seemed so miserable, too. Something was very wrong, and you just wanted to find out what it was, you wanted to _help_ him. But you knew he wouldn’t open up so easily. It wouldn’t be _that_ easy with Kylo. Nonetheless, you’d try. 

Kylo heard your thoughts as he made his way to his own quarters. Even in your current state, all you seemed to think about was his well-being. He couldn’t get behind that logic. He crawled into his own bed, free from the confinement of his daily clothes, and laid there until he fell asleep. As you drifted off into an uncomfortable but deep and much needed sleep, you dreamt of the sun shining on your skin as you sat in a field of tall grass and colorful flowers.


	16. The Commander’s Wrath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You don’t know the vile things he was thinking.” You glared at him as you threw your words at him, “You’re right, I don’t because I don’t pick through people’s thoughts for fun.” In a flash, Kylo’s lightsaber was in his hand and ignited, the searing hot blade pointed at you in anger, reminding you of the injury you’d sustained not even two weeks ago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey peeps, hope you enjoy the chapter! sorry if there are any typos, i scanned through chapter for any and fixed what i saw.and i think i’ll have the next chapter up in about a week! :)

Today was the last day you’d spend in the Finalizer’s medical care. Like Kylo had told you, he’d arranged for you to be moved to a more comfortable room. What you didn’t expect was when you were brought to a room that looked similar to Kylo’s. It had sleek black floors that were practically mirrors from how shiny they were, an expansive bookshelf to the right of the gigantic bed that could fit maybe four people, if you tried. Above the bookshelf was a window that took up the whole wall, displaying the beautiful stars and planets. It also had a bathroom attached to the bedroom that came with a refresher  _ and _ a bath, something you’d never really had the luxury of having. 

Sadly, you thought, this would be the last time you’d ever step foot in this room again. After all, it was only for your recuperation. You were replacing the many books you had read back on the bookshelf, thinking to yourself. After that night you’d seen Kylo, you hadn’t seen him since. You knew he was distancing himself from you. The realization of this stuck needles into your chest and worked them throughout you, but you pushed it to the side. You can’t just let yourself fall into dismay that quickly, you reminded yourself. You slipped the last book in between two others before a loud knock sounded at the door. 

The door hissed open, and there Kylo stood. Kylo spoke lowly to the people standing outside by the door, “Wait for me out here.” You peered your head around to get a glimpse of whoever was outside, but it hissed shut before you got the chance. You stood quickly and smoother out your clothes. “Hi,” you breathed. Your eyes met the visor of his mask and a shiver ran down your spine. The awkward silence wasn’t long before he spoke, “I'm going to Byss. I’ll be gone for a few days.” Your head perked up a little. “Byss? Am I… am I coming?” Your words grew hushed as you finished the sentence. “No.” Kylo’s words were brick hard, no empathy detected. Your head sunk down, “Oh.” 

You knew better than to argue with him. If you did, he’d probably slash this room to bits with his lightsaber, and you didn’t want to test the theory. “Be careful then, I guess.” He pushed his shoulders back and his head lifted, “I’ll be fine.” You bit your tongue at his words. Of course he would. “You should probably leave then. Besides I’m still cleaning this place up to go back to my room.” Your anger slithered out and injected its venom into your words. His smugness rippled off of him before he spoke again. “Keep the room. I arranged it for you, after all.” And then he left. The sound of multiple boots, Kylo’s the heaviest of them all, sped away from the door of your new room, leaving you silent and slightly angry. 

You looked to the clock on the wall and read the time. It was midday, so there was no way you’d report to Hux now. You thought of your position as his “right hand”. It seemed very superficial, but it was still your duty to aid him. Even if he pissed you off to no end sometimes.

The following morning, you woke up at 5am sharp. While detesting the thought of getting up for work, you did feel a little more relaxed and comfortable than you would have felt if you had had to go back to your old quarters. You sat up and made your way to your new bathroom. The mirror was quite large, if you were to guess you’d say it would be four feet by five. The shower was also quite extravagant, it had glass doors that were fogged for privacy. This whole new room situation almost seemed a little too much, but you enjoyed it nonetheless. It was better than that tiny stuff room by a long shot. 

After your shower, you ran your fingers through your long hair until it was all slicked back, showing off your cheekbones. You slipped into your uniform that’d you’d gone and snagged from your old room last night, and slipped on your oh so familiar shoes. They were your only pair, seeing as the Finalizer didn’t permit more than the necessary items for every one on board. You made your way to the mess hall where there were countless individuals, no doubt a result of the horrible end of Starkiller base. Pain stung in your heart at the base’s mention. You still had no idea where Min was, if he was alive. Frances unfortunately disappeared into thin air, probably taking care of dozens of the injured and sick that were overflowing the ship's medical center. 

You grabbed whatever tray you could find and sat at the only (luckily) uninhabited table in the mess hall. You hated to say it, but you kind of missed the food the medical droids would serve you. It’d be a soup, or some sort of meat with vegetables. It definitely tasted better than whatever they served in here. You looked at the gigantic oblong clock on the wall of the hall. It was now 6:02 am, meaning you needed to hurry up to meet Hux at 6:30. Upon entering Hux’s office, he spoke. “Lieutenant, we’ve got lots to do today.” 

You decrypted a lot of useless stuff. It would either be a few sentences regarding nothing useful, or it would be complete gibberish. Sometimes it would be something from Hutt Space, which still turned out to be nothing important. On the holo in front of you, you typed in Byss. The planet’s hologram came up, the planet spinning slowly as you studied it. It was a beautiful planet for sure, but you had no idea what Kylo and those people outside of your door were going to do on Byss. You don’t even think you wanted to know. 

You checked the holo for the time. You were two hours away from shift end, and then you could go relax in your comfortable bed and read a good book. Those books on the shelves had some really good stories, if you were honest. Another hour passed, Hux had come back in from carrying out whatever business he tended to and you were counting every minute that passed. As soon as the clock changed to 1900, you were out the door and running to the mess hall. Hux only rolled his eyes as you bolted out the door. 

As you crossed the threshold to the mess hall, you bumped into someone and almost collided with the floor. You caught yourself, and turned swiftly to meet eyes with whomever you’d run into. It was a man with blue eyes and light brown hair. He held up his hands to show he meant no harm, “I’m sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going,” he spoke. You opened your mouth and closed it before smoothing out your uniform. “It’s alright, I wasn’t looking either.” You gave him a closed smile, lips pulled tight over your teeth, “See you around,” you mumbled before heading to the line to get a tray of food. 

~

As Kylo made his way off of his ship, his knights followed. He stalked through the tree line till he came to the temple he’d been searching for. “Guard my ship,” he barked. The knights retreated, staying behind to watch the Command Shuttle. Truthfully, it needed no watching, this area was desolate. Kylo just to go in alone. He marched up to the temple doors and opened them, the large wood creaking from lack of use. He stormed into the control center, hitting buttons and keys, even slamming his fist against the control panel as it beeped at him. Finally, a mechanism clicked and a pedestal rose from the metal floor a few feet away from the panel.

He walked over to it slowly as it came to a halt. On top of the pedestal stood a glass case with a small door on the side. He opened it, and reached inside of the glass case. He pulled his hand back, and in it, a pyramidal wayfinder. Black, detailed metal adorned every corner of the piece. He tucked it away and left the temple. His knights perked up a little as Kylo stood in front of the Command Shuttle. “Let’s go.” 

~

It had been four days since Kylo left. You’d waited and thought, thinking of what he would say or do when he got back. Probably nothing, you thought, but your mind wandered to various scenarios. Hux hadn’t been that much of a dick while the Commander was away, which made it way more endurable. Hux had mentioned that Kylo would be arriving sometime today. That’s great, you thought, maybe he’ll ignore me some more. Hux broke you out of your train of thought and spoke, “I’d like you to deliver a message for me. Tell the Commander that I’m expecting him in my office upon his return. Go wait in the hangar. You’re dismissed once you’ve relayed the message.”

You nodded and turned around, walking the opposite way of Hux. Disdain wore heavy on your features as you waited in the hangar for the Command Shuttle to appear. Within an hour, it came flying in before the landing gear extended and the ship rested on the floor. You stood slowly, arms behind your back, and waited for the ramp of the ship to lower. Kylo descended, and then six more people followed. All of them had some semblance of Kylo stuck into them, from their masks to their armor. You walked over to Kylo who was now looking at you, mask on and cloak wrapped around his shoulders. 

“Commander,” you said as you stood in front of him, “General Hux requires your presence.” He said nothing. He only stalked away, leaving you in the presence of the men who also seemed to be making their way to their own quarters. Another stake of anger jabbed into your chest. Why was he being such an asshole? Kylo’s men dispersed, leaving you all alone with your thoughts. You looked around at the hangar, examining all the engineers working on different shuttles and TIE fighters. Your eyes landed on a certain man, with light brown hair and a dirty uniform. You walked over to him and tapped his shoulder. 

He spun around quickly, datapad in his hands, and his eyes held a look of surprise in them. “Oh, hey, the mess hall...right?” He pointed a finger at you and you smiled, “Yeah. I never caught your name.” He took a glance at his datapad and shut it off before looking back to you, “My name’s William. What’s yours?” You told him your name and shook his hand. “So you’re an engineer?” You pointed to the shuttle he was fixing. “Uh, yeah, some pilot trashed the whole thing so we had to gut it, basically.” You rolled onto the back of your heels and put your feet flat again. “Must be hell of a job,” you said as you imagined what it looked like on the inside. 

“Hey, when do you get off shift?” Your arms were still behind your back as you spoke. “I get off in thirty minutes.” You smiled, “Well meet me in the mess hall and we can talk. I’ll see you later, William.” You walked out of the hangar and to the mess hall, a smile still on your face. 

You waited patiently till you saw William walk through the corridor. The both of you walked to the food line and grabbed a tray, talking while you ate. You would laugh at Williams jokes, and he would chuckle at your words. He seemed like he would be a really good friend. You both chatted some more, your trays now empty, and you put the trays back on the line to be cleaned and sterilized. You and William walked through the halls still talking. “Well, I’ve got to get going. Gotta get up early to work on the shuttle tomorrow.” A mouse droid sped past your feet as you shuffled idly back and forth. 

“I’ll see you around then, William. Goodnight.” He waves as you begin to make your way down the corridor. “Goodnight,” he calls as you disappear around the corner. You continue walking and turn around the corner, only to be met with Kylo. He was breathing heavily, chest rising and falling, “ _ Who was that _ ?” His voice was laced with anger as he spoke. “That was just a friend,” you said quietly, fear crawling it’s way up your throat and clawing at your chest. “I don’t believe that.” Even under his mask, you could feel his piercing gaze through it. “Well you should,” you spit back. Kylo only grew angrier, the evidence showing in his impossibly rapid breathing. 

His hands clenched into fists by his sides. “You don’t  _ know  _ the vile things he was thinking.” You glared at him as you threw your words at him, “You’re right, I  _ don’t  _ because I don’t pick through people’s thoughts for fun.” In a flash, Kylo’s lightsaber was in his hand and ignited, the searing hot blade pointed at you in anger, reminding you of the injury you’d sustained not even two weeks ago. Kylo tore apart the wall next to you, making you cower in fear. Others far off in the hallway ran, escaping Kylo and his wrath. You fell back on your butt and scuttled away with your hands and feet, desperate to get away. You flipped over and clawed at the floor till you were on your feet and running away from the horror flashing before your eyes.

You knew Kylo had tantrums like this, before you’d even met him there would be whispers about what he’d destroyed in Sector 4. Who met an unfortunate demise on Level 7. All of what’d you’d heard was hushed whispers, the voices scared he’d be right around the corner listening, waiting for the chance to pounce on someone. Your feet carried you all the way to your room and you slipped inside, pressing buttons on the keypad next to the door to lock it. Your chest was heaving painfully as tears ran down your cheeks. This side of Kylo was something you never wanted to see again. You slide down the door and bring your knees up to your chest, clutching them with trembling fingers.

It took time to steady your breath, but you did it, and slowly made your way to your bed. You peeled yourself out of your uniform and slipped your charcoal grey tank top on. As you laid your head down onto the soft pillows, you brought another of the many on your bed to your chest and hugged it tightly. Slowly, you fell asleep, something in the back of your head still fearful that Kylo would make his way to your room.


End file.
